Chapter 18: Personality – The Secret to Growth

“Nothing great is done

without great men;

and people are great if they are determined to be great.” – Charles De Gaule

No marks were found on his body.

The Japanese kept him in a cramped room for 24 hours,

but they never beat or tortured him.

They even gave him a cigarette or two…and after a polite conversation,

this American soldier wrote a self-confident confession about the countless injustices

and destructiveness of life according to the law.

American style and praised the superiority and humanity of the Japanese fascist regime.

After this confession,

he also provided the Japanese military with military information,

denounced his fellow prisoners and enthusiastically denounced his own country.

What made this person completely turn his world upside down

and give up all the beliefs he had cultivated since childhood?

What made you deny the basic values ​​that you have embraced for so long

and now run to cooperate with the enemy?

What single change caused a complete transformation in this man’s thoughts, feelings, and actions?

The answer lies in understanding the path that led him to change his personality.

Now he was simply acting in accordance with his new vision of himself.

Throughout this book, you have explored with me the influence of beliefs,

one of the elements of the Master System that guides all of our judgments.

Beliefs guide us to conclusions and so they teach us how to feel and act.

However, there are different degrees of belief with varying degrees of impact on the quality of our lives.

For example, your beliefs about a close friend of yours will determine how you think

and feel about your friend’s attitudes and about the meaning you assign to his actions.

If you “know” he’s likable,

then even if he seems angry at times,

you won’t question his goodwill.

This belief will guide all your interactions with this person.

But it won’t necessarily affect how you treat a stranger.

These beliefs affect you only in one particular area of ​​your life:

your interactions with this friend.

However, some beliefs have a large impact on your life,

which are general beliefs.

These beliefs have far-reaching and far-reaching consequences.

For example, your beliefs about humanity in general will affect not only the way you treat your friends,

but everyone you meet.

These beliefs will have a big impact on your career,

your confidence level,

your family life, and so on.

For example, your general beliefs about lack

and excess will determine your level of anxiety

and your generosity in terms of time, money, energy, and spirit.

If you believe that we live in a resource-poor world in which only money, time,

and love are abundant,

you will always live in fear that you will never have it. enough.

This anxiety will affect the way you think about those around you,

your colleagues,

your finances,

and opportunities in general.

However, stronger than all of the above beliefs,

there is one fundamental belief that illuminates and refines all our perceptions.

This basic belief directly controls our consistency in the decisions we make in our lives.

Those are beliefs about your personality.

So what is love?

It’s simply the beliefs we use to define our own personality that make us unique good,

bad, or neutral – different from all other individuals.

And our sense of certainty about ourselves forms the boundaries of our lives.

“We feel the influence

the noblest of outstanding people

after we’ve lost their presence.”- Ralph Waldo Emerson

We all act consistently with our view of who we really are,

whether that view is accurate or not.

The reason is because within us there is an incomparable power,

the need for consistency.

Throughout life, we have become accustomed to associating suffering with inconsistency

and satisfaction with consistency.

Think about it.

How will we judge a person when he says one thing and does another,

wants to see himself as this but behaves differently.

We call them hypocrites, petty people, inconsistent, fickle, unreliable.

Of course you don’t want to be that person.

On the contrary, when we behave in a consistent manner according to our personality, we experience great pleasures.

With people who behave consistently with their personality,

we call them honest, trustworthy, intelligent, stable, reasonable, consistent.

Of course you want to be this type of person.

How are our personalities formed?

During the Korean War, very many American POWs denounced their fellow prisoners.

The main reason is that the Chinese communists understand very well the power of personality

to instantly change not only one’s long-held beliefs and values,

but also one’s actions.

They don’t need to torture or torture physically,

but they cleverly apply their own form of psychological warfare,

not merely to gather information or make submissions,

but to convert American soldiers according to their political philosophy.

They knew that if they could bring this warrior into a new system of beliefs and values,

he would see for himself his country’s role in the war as futile and destructive

and so he Will be ready to assist them in whatever they ask.

And they succeeded.

Understanding what they did can help you understand how you have come

to have your existing personality and how you can develop it.

And developing personality,

you can develop your whole life in just a short time.

Ask yourself,

have you consciously chosen your personality,

or is your personality set up for you by others,

created by important events in your life,

and by other factors that have influenced you?

happen that you are not aware of or do not accept?

What consistent behaviors have you chosen that now help form the foundation of your personality?

Would you be willing to endure extreme pain to save a stranger?

Most of the time, the first answer is, “Definitely not”.

But in a study in 1970,

researchers discovered that if a person came to believe that the consistency of their personality was based on it,

they would inevitably have a different behavior. surrender like that.

Research has demonstrated that if people are asked to make small decisions at first,

then take two actions that show that if they don’t voluntarily give themselves up,

they will be “characterless” people.

who will begin to develop a new personality.

They will find themselves as “self-sacrificing” people who selflessly volunteer with their own sacrifices to help those in need.

They will then feel compelled by the power of their new identity

to act without hesitation about the time, money,

or sacrifices they have to make.

Their view of themselves as “self-sacrificing” people becomes a mirror of themselves.

There is no stronger force than personality in shaping people’s attitudes.

Personality development

If you find that your personality is not what you wanted,

take these 4 steps to develop your personality:

1. Write down a list of all the elements you want in your personality right away.

While writing, trust that as long as you are determined,

you can change.

Who has the qualities you would like to have?

Can they be a role model for you?

Can you imagine how you would breathe?

How to walk?

Think how?

How do you feel?

2. If you really want to develop your personality and your life,

then consciously decide right now what kind of person you will be.

Be as excited as a baby and describe the person you want to be today.

Write down your growing list.

3. Now develop a plan of action that you can take to foster a sense that you are being honest

and consistent with your new identity.

As you develop this program,

keep an eye out for friends with whom you enjoy socializing.

Do they help strengthen or destroy the personality you’re building?

4. The final step is to stick with your new personality by spreading it around you.

However, the most important way to spread the word is to announce it to yourself.

Use your new brand to describe yourself every day,

and it will become your custom.

“If we all do what we’re capable of,

We’ll really surprise ourselves.”-Thomas Edison

The future of your personality

We live in a world that is constantly evolving,

and so our personalities must also be constantly evolving

in order to enjoy all the best quality of life.

You need to be aware of the things that can affect your personality,

recognize the positive and negative effects,

and take full control of this process.

Otherwise, you will become a prisoner of your past.

Ask yourself, “Am I still the same person I was when I started reading this book?”

I’m always self-improvement to grow

and people are often surprised to see how much confidence I have when embarking on new adventures.

People often ask me,

“How do you do so many things in the world?”

I think it’s largely because I have a different perspective than most people:

while most people need strength to be confident,

on the contrary,

I decided to feel confident first,

so that I could be confident firm faith to persevere until

when I got my strength.

That is why my personality is not limited by past experiences.

You and I need to develop a view of ourselves: who are we?

We need to make sure that the labels we put on ourselves don’t limit us,

but push us forward,

so that we can always make what was good in us forever better.

This is the power of faith.

Be excited, be comfortable. Play like a child.

Discover the adventures that come your way day by day

and develop the certainty that each day you go by you become better,

stronger and more fulfilled.

Now let’s have a little fun with the 7 day challenge.

Each day I will give you a short exercise for you to apply what you have learned

and give you the opportunity to begin reaping the fruits of some of the strategies

and methods you have been presented with.

Here we begin the Seven Days of Forming Your Destiny.