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A Life of Negotiation. Principles of Negotiators and Negotiators

A Life of Negotiation

Chapter 12: Principles of Negotiators and Negotiators

In a lifetime,

there must be hundreds of thousands of negotiations.

Even at a young age,

even asking for a piece of candy,

a piece of cake,

there are still children who ask more skillfully than others,

knowing how to promise their parents that

they will study well,

be obedient,

and obey.

Dare to make such a promise,

using such sweet words,

which parents would refuse.

The ingenuity of trading is like having since childhood…

In adolescence,

when the needs of life are more,

of course,

the opportunity to exchange is more.

Each exchange is a small negotiation.

And then the matter of boys and girls going

through puberty also had to have some convincing

before getting married,

and when they wanted to get married,

there was a negotiation

between the boy’s family and the girl’s family.

Asking a wife to ask her husband is always a discussion

with oneself first – accept or not,

and then,

the bride’s family and the groom’s family have to have a delicate

but serious discussion about rituals,


betel nut, fruit, jewelry for the bride…

The conversation between the two families,

though warm,

is equally difficult,

because of course there are demands from both sides,

sometimes containing a bit of legal proceedings source from social class.

When you enter your professional life,

every day you go through hundreds of things

to think about and consider,

then you will discover that

there is no gift in life that is free,

amidst the intimate but oppressive atmosphere of job.

Over the years,

the natural jealousy among co-workers,

the fraught encounters with clients

or the main/subcontractors would have been better

for those who were clever,


and inspiring credibility,

good communication skills,

if compared with less dynamic

and psychological colleagues.

Just like that,

every day is a series of incidents that force you to negotiate,

with administrative agencies,


trading places,

people with whom you have the opportunity

to share interests or whatever other.

In short,

you will inevitably have to negotiate for life,

every day,

every hour.

And that’s not to mention the internal negotiations,

but the hardest is with yourself

and with your hundred-year-old companion!

Sometimes you wonder how you can learn ways

to negotiate more skillfully and effectively.

And those of you learning to succeed in negotiations

in every marketplace in the world will wonder

if there’s a way to take skill to the level of an art!

In a previous chapter

I had the opportunity to talk about innate ability,

as well as the result of diligent study.

It is undeniable that there are many people with real talent,

but the idea of giftedness responds only to the daily negotiations.

When it comes to negotiating large,

complicated projects,

or having to deal with events of large gatherings of partners,

surely careful consideration of content

and preparation will help you come to the desired results,

Or at least it will help you negotiate confidently and comfortably.


many of you get along well

before having to speak in front of strangers,

even in a small conference room

with people you’ve never met before.

That timid attitude is actually not correct.

You have all the right things you want to share with those

who come to hear,

so what’s there to be afraid of?

Be daring,


even innocent to speak!

It can be said that negotiation should be the natural attitude

of anyone in this 21st century.

The world was flat,

it was globalized.

Never before has the languages of the world come

so close to the “common language”,

perhaps due to the borderless nature of the media,

the public presence of social networks,

the bold character of the literature become today.

Nowadays, everything has to be negotiated

because everyone has to be satisfied,

no one can pressure anyone,

no one will accept being forced.

Such is the world of democracy,

the world of equality.

The world regresses on millions of human compromises,

every hour,

every minute.

Every hour,

every minute,

so it’s all negotiation!

To help readers fully understand the content of the negotiation,

I would like to offer the following key points to remember,

and to remember to keep yourself comfortable

when having to discuss with someone you just met,

or have to discuss with others unfamiliar people.

1. Negotiation is first and foremost a conversation

between people

When it comes to people’s affairs,

everything is complicated,

even from the moment of meeting and facing.

One thousand people,

one thousand colors.

There are people who are easy to believe

or there are people who are skeptical;

some people are more active than others;

some people are lively,

some people are quiet;

Some people have rich and beautiful words,

others are unable to express themselves clearly;

Some are harsh,

some are generous;

there are people who give up

as easily as there are persistent friends;

some friends look quiet and peaceful,

but maybe their emotions are high;

Some people are profound as well as some superficial…

Until people as diverse as the above sit at the conference table

with a discussion schedule full of controversial points to be discussed,

the negotiation can easily lead to situations.

unpredictable situations.

It’s like a chemical interaction between chemicals

that have never been mixed together,

the results easily surprising.

Sometimes into dynamite!

So when people sit with people,

especially when discussing big things,

each unit must be very attentive,

see if the partner’s statements come from the heart,



or from where?

Sometimes their thoughts even bring up happy

or sad experiences from the past!

Not to mention the influence of culture

and religion lying in the heart of every playwright,

just waiting for a favorable opportunity

to rise up like waves breaking the shore.

The two sides do not know each other,

how will they receive each other’s statements

when sitting together for the first time?


who knows in advance!

But no matter how unexpected,

the outcome of the negotiation must still be good,

so the art of negotiation must be rooted in an exemplary life philosophy,

elegant behavior style,

taking mutual respect as the source.

At a minimum,

be moderate to meet partners from all genders.

The result of negotiation is an agreement obtained from two

or more partners who do not necessarily know each other

before sitting down to negotiate.

That identification sometimes only applies to something small,

but sometimes it sets the stage for a great work

to be accomplished together.

Art is from not knowing each other to sharing actions,

finding mutual benefits,

exchanging trust,

connecting a future sky together.

Art is like that.

5 minutes ago we did not know each other,

by the time the negotiation was over,

there was a schedule,

a guaranteed model,

and a happy lineup.

That’s what people are like.

Mastering the art is to present a collaborative model

that holds great promise.

The more you enter into negotiations with unfamiliar partners,

the more you expand the future.

The more involved,

the more options there will be.

The more you share,

the wider your horizons will be.

2. Negotiation is about respecting the interlocutor

Respect for each other is not just a formality on the surface,

but reflects style and culture in behavior.

It should be proof that

the partners genuinely care about each other’s requirements

and treat them as legitimate.

A lot of people misunderstand this,

thinking that just listening to it silently shows enough respect.

This is just the beginning.

Appreciation goes beyond that.

Listening to the partner’s statements will force

to raise possible questions

to help both parties better understand each other’s intentions.

Not asking the right questions will surprise the other side

of the conference table,

that the audience does not know

if they want to dig deeper,

or just superficially wait for the time to pass,

or at least be inactive?

A sensitive,

emotional partner may sometimes

even think that the other side’s superficiality shows a little contempt.

Harmful instead!

A negotiation can fail

as soon as one party shows a lack of interest,

does not react,

does not raise additional

or critical thoughts!

What’s the point of continuing the discussion

if one side has no real intention of getting results?

Negative attitudes are very common,

sometimes unintentionally.

But both intentionally or unintentionally have the potential

to lead to a situation of “sympathetic bridging”.

From then on,

the negotiation was easy to be bland,


and polite.

The outcome of the negotiation is difficult to achieve the target.

I have also encountered many very positive cases like the following two.

I witnessed a meeting between two fathers.

The father of the bride-to-be

and the father of the groom-to-be sit together

without telling anyone else,

not even their own wives.

They boldly got to know each other

with the aim of discovering the true potential

of the marriage between their two children.

They describe to each other the child,

the ambitions of the child they were born and raised,

their interests,

talents, and traits,

to find out if their two beloved children will find lasting happiness or not.

The two fathers talked honestly

with nothing hidden from each other,

trying to check for potential conflicts,

if any.

After that,

the two children were married.

The two fathers were not mistaken:

the ultimate goal is the happiness of their children,

not just a beautiful wedding ceremony.

They were aware of the responsibility of parents

for the future of their children.

During a negotiation in France about a tram project,

I frankly met the person

who led the negotiation on the other side.

I explained that the negotiations

between the two sides this time were really difficult

due to a lot of contradictions,

but even so the two sides still had to try to reach a result.

This is really a paradox.

I explained that

before the two delegations met the next day,

I felt it necessary to have a one-on-one meeting

between the two delegation leaders to draw up a roadmap

for the negotiations,

otherwise the next day’s meeting could easily derail.

I expected the other leader to understand that,

and he got it right.

The next day,

we each led the negotiating delegation on the right path,

and not only that,

we soon reached a good conclusion,

even though each side had to make many sacrifices.

Positive attitude and responsibility of

I met the respect of the partner.

That is a lucky thing.

If we hadn’t met first perhaps

the negotiation wouldn’t have gone like that.

3. Know what you really want

When one or more parties enter into a negotiation

without knowing what they are aiming for,

buying and selling at what price,

what are the requirements and detailed conditions,

the negotiation never gives the desired results.

Are you surprised that I write this?

In my professional life,

I have encountered many such cases.

Not mindless interlocutors.

But sometimes they represent a group of people,

a corporation,

an association in which there is no consensus on the content

of the negotiation.

The person sent to negotiate does not know

what his Board of Directors really wants,

while the Chairman wants this,

the General Director wants that,

sometimes even intentionally giving vague instructions

to the reason is not clear.

Delegates at the conference table can only keep silent,

their hearts are scattered,

their minds flutter:

“What to say now?”.

In such cases,

the negotiation hovers like a boat

without a rudder in the middle of a river.

Of course,

in such situations I often remark that

the delegates are content to have a happy meeting

because they themselves are aware that

no one knows what anyone wants.

In contrast,

no negotiation is more lively and lively than

when both sides clearly know what

they are going to the conference with.

And oftentimes,

the negotiation is easy to come to fruition,

even though there are fierce debates on several key points of contention.

But at least both sides know where the conflicts are

and then try to smooth them out.

4. Negotiating is mutual/multi-party trust

With the exception of compromises obtained

by intimidation or deception,

all outcomes of a negotiation are possible only

when there is mutual trust between the parties.

Trust easily leads to unity,

each believing that equal gain and sacrifice

and compromise are a balanced contribution.

The concept of balance is objective,

but still contains subjectivity.

All situations lie there!

Negotiating cannot avoid subjectivity.

Credibility is the offspring of subjectivity.

Trust does not rely on anything obvious,

especially when partners are new to each other.

Trusting each other,


doesn’t make any sense.

In negotiations,

it’s ultimately what you sign or don’t sign.

But to come to a contract,

the intuition of each actor plays a decisive role.

It causes the word “want”,

and only if you want to go ahead,

get into the details,

then spend time looking for an agreement.

In the negotiations to buy and sell football players,

we witness the great role of subjectivity.

Let’s take the example of the transfer of famous players

such as Zidane, Ronaldo,

Messi and especially Gareth Bale (between 2013-2014).

How are their legs so expensive,

and especially so the price difference.

The more mediocre players,

being transferred for less than a tenth of the price

of the player are considered superior…

How to explain that one player can cost dozens of times more than another?


there is a subjectivity in assessing talent and performance.

From what objective data would a football team spend that much money

to entice a player to serve on its side?

Speaking of which,

how can we not count the merits

of the intermediaries standing in the dark

who skillfully polish the talents of domestic horses,

they also hit the subjectivity.

Subjective reasoning is based on trust and credibility.

Who to trust if not in the partners and actors in the negotiation?

Only being subjective opens the gap for the art of persuasion

through the trust of buyers or sellers.

It is the subjective aspect

that brings salt to the negotiation,

but the delegate to negotiate must be a psychological magician

who knows how to skillfully gain trust.

In project negotiations too,

although the cost can be calculated scientifically and objectively,

at the same time,

each negotiating party still looks at the project

with a very subjective eye.

When they have trust with their partners,

they want to end!

Although objectively,

there are legal,


financial tools,

computer-based scientific models that allow

the correct evaluation of the project,

although there are many professional consulting firms to help,

but it is still difficult for the delegation leader

to avoid subjective reasoning based on trust.

After all,

people are still people,

and in every adventure let their instincts guide them.

And in every trust there is a hunch.

5. Control your words and gestures

When I brought an entire delegation to negotiate,

I was very afraid of inexperienced members in my team.

These people often unintentionally reveal the true temperature of our team.

Once we were very satisfied with the progress of the negotiations.


a young engineer in my group accidentally clapped his hands excitedly,

oh only lightly,

but the other side saw it.

And the very next day they changed their voices,


They thought they had made a mistake the day

before during the discussion.

My friend,

when you go alone to negotiate,

it is difficult to control your words

and gestures when you go

With a large delegation,

the task is even more difficult.

6. Understanding each other: communication techniques!

Understanding and empathizing is not a simple matter.

Each of us encounters a lot of situations like

“I’ve made it clear to him a dozen times already…


when did you say it

without seeing him understand…”.

It turns out that he said he did,

but understood but did not understand.

So the important question is “said”

or “understood”?

I remember in a training program,

a coach put our students in a “real” game.

Coach asked:

When a woman says my red shirt is beautiful,

what does it mean,

how should I understand?

Is the shirt beautiful because of the red color,

or is she implying that

I look good in the red shirt?

Or does she want to ask where to buy one for her husband or friend?

Or does she want to confess?

There are a few more theories…

it’s up to your imagination.

When people asked the woman directly what

she really wanted to say about the red shirt,

she just wanted to say that

the red color of the shirt has a very flat luster,

rarely seen such bright red.

But is she telling the truth?

Then what does she think the man in red understands

when she compliments his shirt?

There is a difference between speaking and understanding,

much less between wanting to say and wanting to understand!

So let me ask you again,

if she keeps saying

“Your red shirt is beautiful”,

she clearly doesn’t master the content of the words

and the presentation technique.

In a formal negotiation,

the statement should have been:

“I want to buy the same red shirt as yours.

This shirt has a very special red color,

rarely seen.

I’m looking for this exact red shirt,

not another red”!

And maybe add:

“Just to be clear,

the style of the shirt is not important to me.

I just found that red one!

And I really don’t care who wears that shirt.”

In your opinion,

is it clear enough in the negotiation?

You are not yet!

She had to ask further:

“I don’t know

if I’m clear enough,

please ask again if you heard,

how do you understand,

please tell me again to make sure you understand what I mean,

before we continue to negotiate…”

That’s it,


It is impossible to overstep,

superficially think that just saying that

the red shirt is beautiful is thinking that

the partner has understood exactly what he wants them to understand.

In negotiation, every time you come up with a new idea,

make sure the other party understands exactly what you want them to understand

and you also have to double check that they got it right!

Because if they don’t get it right,

the whole content of the negotiation from there will be meaningless,

a waste of both time and effort.

Continuing to negotiate

while the assumption has been misinterpreted

is like walking into the forest and getting lost.

7. Negotiation is the exchange of products and values:

the win-win principle

You or your company have a product with its features.

That product meets the needs of the people,

people like it and will buy it at a certain price.

Let’s say you raise the price and see that

there are fewer buyers,

you lower the price but also no more customers.

So you can conclude that

the price you initially set is the correct value

of the product in the consumer market.

When “Bom has a fan”

that Phu Ong wanted to exchange with three cows,

nine buffaloes,

a deep pond with catfish,

a raft of ironwood,

a tortoiseshell bird…

and finally a handful of sticky rice,

the value of the product is clear.

“fan mo” is equivalent

to a handful of sticky rice in the subjective eyes of Bom.

If Bom brought a lot of mo fans to the market to sell,

and then there were a lot of people who wanted

to exchange a handful of sticky rice with a mo fan,

it’s clear that the market appreciates the mo fan

as well as Phu Ong!

From a subjective assumption of Phu Ong or Bom,

we are further determined that

the price of the fan mo fan approved

by the market is affordable,

such a subjective price is equivalent to the objective price!

The principle of win-win

(beneficial to both parties) would be too simple

if both parties to the purchase

and sale reasoned objectively and scientifically.

Suppose that Phu Ong fell in love with the fan,

I’m sure he would have felt the price even higher,

as if he wanted to exchange a hundred cows for the fan.

You think it’s a myth?

Someone in the world has dared to spend a million dollars

to buy a rare stamp.

Or a hundred million dollars to buy a painting.

No matter how precious the stamp or painting is,

it doesn’t explain why the purchase price is so high.

The truth is that the obligatory buyer has used a two-way subjectivity,

on the one hand, the passion is too high,

on the other hand,

they must have underestimated the million-dollar unit that

they probably earned very easily.

So when they spend a million dollars on a stamp,

they are sure to see the benefit of capturing a rare opportunity,

while the stamp seller may also think

they have been lucky enough to earn some money with big enough

to live comfortably for at least a dozen years.

Both of them were sweating profusely!

Win-win is that.

The thing to remember is that

the subjective personality heavily dominates the win-win principle.

Due to the subjective nature,

someone who is good at negotiating will always find a loophole.

Can a product be objectively priced too high,

and at the same time subjectively priced too cheap?

Is there a paradox in that question?

Yes or  no.

When customers want to buy a product,

they compare it with similar products on the market,

of course the price is the same,

that is the objective price.

But if the product has features

that the seller cleverly presents,

its allure is multiplied.

That’s the subjective price.

Here’s another common example:

two neighbors exchanging tools in the house.

One guy has two picks,

the other has two shovels.

Soon they will find a clever exchange

so that each of them has a pickaxe and a shovel.

A spare pickaxe for a spare shovel,

both of which are worth too little

because they’re leftovers.

But when you change hands,

the leftovers become precious!

The win-win principle is sometimes great!

The art of negotiation is also about finding ways to make cheap things expensive,

and surplus things very valuable

because they are very useful at the right moment of negotiation.

After all,

win-win is not necessarily based on objective

or subjective values,

as long as both parties find it beneficial to exchange.

8. Negotiating is finding a way to collaborate

When entering into negotiations,

both parties or multiple parties want to achieve results.

I would like to exclude the case that

the negotiation has no purpose.

Achieving results means consistently bipartisan/

multi-party approach,

narrowing the theoretical

or practical gap between the dual/multi-stakeholder group

until there are no more contradictions.

This means that each party involved is prepared,

has a model in hand,

from the product they want to buy/sell,

the price they want to pay,

to the acceptable form of cooperation.


a negotiation is successful

when both parties/multiparties find the desired outcome.

Success is even more perfect

when both parties are happy to acknowledge

that the results are very balanced,

without excessive sacrifices on either side.

Here, we must realize that negotiation is not a place

to defeat an opponent

or “blood-draw” a faction.

It marks a consensus,

in trust,

a will to rely on each other to move towards creating added value

and profit for each other.

Only then can we properly understand the content of the negotiation.

9. The basis of negotiation is that all partners are equal

Many times when you go to the conference table,

there are two people on your side,

or only you,

and then see the other side suddenly bring 20 people,

including the President,

General Director and a number of Directors and experts high-class,

surely you can’t avoid “match”.

This has happened to me many times,

and I “match” every time!

It wasn’t until I was older that

I suppressed this sentiment

and understood one simple thing:

a negotiation is a place where two sides are equal.

If there is a seller,

there is a buyer.

If there is a party that wants to talk,

there is also a side that listens.

Social status is nothing

but respect for each partner on a personal level.

Just like the Bom story.

Phu Ong is the richest man in the village

who still has to respect the other side,

is a buffalo boy with a very small fortune,

a fan! The two factions Bom and Phu Ong could not coerce each other

with the rich and the poor.

I once had to negotiate one-on-one

with a President of a country on the shores of the Indian Ocean.

He sat in the middle of the courtiers,

and even gave me a probe first to put pressure on me with authority.

I went alone,

but a letter of authorization from the Board of Directors is available.

When the most delicate thing came up,

I just used the words “on your side”

to avoid putting more pressure on myself.

And I have successfully negotiated on an equal footing,

although I find myself a little tense

while the other side seems more relaxed.

The beauty of negotiation is

that when sitting at the conference table,

even if there are cats and mice,

they are still completely equal!

Unless you’re drawn into an unequal negotiation,

with a gun pointed at you,

for example,

just remember one thing:

being unfair is no longer negotiating.

You should never sign a piece of paper.

The point of the gun is fine,

but they still need you to sign!

Once you sign,

they don’t need you anymore.

On another occasion,

I sat alone in front of a world-famous Korean Chaebol founder and chairman,

and I negotiated with him one-on-one for 3 days and 3 nights.

At another time

I also negotiated with a General

who commanded the army of a powerful country.

At those times,

I kept reminding myself that

my signature was as heavy as my partner’s,

regardless of their title and power.

Remember that when negotiating,

even with God,

even with the army,

both sides enjoy equal status.

If unfortunately there is only one person on your side,

that is not a reason to be inferior.

If you’re lucky,

your side is a powerful army of engineers,

lawyers, and experts,

and on the other side of the conference table is just an anonymous delegate,

then you won’t be able to force them in the end.

10. Negotiation can only be fun, so it should be fun!

The prospect of negotiation is a contract,

at least mutually beneficial.

But you have to understand negotiation broader than that.

The two sides have negotiated with each other

have linked arms to perform the contract together,

at least get to know each other more,

have the opportunity to get to know each other,

have the opportunity to work together on the terms.

Therefore, the results of negotiation not only bring more benefits

to each other,

but also bring more joy.

Even if you fail bitterly,

you will also have the opportunity to get to know many more characters

that you will have the opportunity to meet again later.

Whether you succeed or fail,

it is wise to create a peaceful,

joyful atmosphere.

Failure on terms that one of the parties cannot accept

for the sake of the company does not mean

that there is a personal enmity

between two business delegates?

Negotiations fail for many reasons

such as unsuitable products,

unsuitable prices,

and unscheduled delivery deadlines.

In any case,

what crime caused the loss of joy?

Negotiation should always be understood as fun.

Even if the negotiation doesn’t work out,

you should still turn your partner into a true friend.

Because when they see your faction keeping happy

with their demands,

they will sympathize,

as if they owe you something.

The next time you negotiate,

they will pay the spiritual debt that

you have skillfully planted in their subconscious.

11. Good negotiators can check the potential

Good bargaining and good trading go hand in hand.

Meeting opportunities happen every day,

every place,

across every horizon.

You must be aware that

the partners you meet always have hidden needs.

If you’re not tactful,

your partner won’t share those needs with you,

and the meeting won’t end up going out of the way of normal etiquette.

But if you know how to make your partner more expressive,

maybe they have a hidden need

that your company or someone around you can satisfy.

When Phu Ong in the story of Mr. Bom uploads images

such as buffalo,




and tortoiseshell birds,

Phu Ong is examining the hidden potential of Mr. Bom.

How clever he is!

The main art is there.

One step more clever are the very good sales people,

not only know what the partner wants,

but also have the ability to create a need

that the partner does not have or do not have.

My friend in the US has a 14-year-old son

who is extremely sharp

and agile in business.

You sit next to him for a while

and he will sell you a fishing rod,

a set of rackets…

He even brags that

he has sold a car to his classmate’s father.

It doesn’t have a store anyway!

In just a moment it will find out your needs,

moreover it will create more needs that you do not have.

It will then find

you the best and cheapest deal,

it will buy it for you at the cheapest price,

and you won’t be able to avoid giving it a well-deserved commission!

In my distant family,

there is a 15-year-old kid

who already has a very busy virtual store.

It goes to the Internet,

pulls out cute Japanese clothes,

and displays it in its virtual store.

And since then there are many customers online.

He earned so much income that,

at only 17 years old,

he dared to invite his parents on a trip to Singapore.

It’s all covered.

Obviously its talent is to check

and sense the flow of customers’ clothing needs online.

Trading is about guessing or creating demand.



must go beyond the content of the negotiation.

It is knowing what customers mean,

even going beyond their needs,

guessing a desire,

a craving…;

In short,

it creates a need that is lurking in the subconscious of the partner.

12. Good negotiators know how to seduce customers

The basis of negotiation is to attract customers.

It’s easy to say.

Some people have innate abilities,

but most people have to learn the art of attraction methodically.

You try to compare the iPhone with Samsung’s Galaxy,

two smartphone-type mobile phones,

and you clearly see the iPhone technology is somewhat higher,

more applications.

However, each smartphone attracts customers in a different way.

There are even customers who love this car

so much that they have to hate the other technology.

That proves the attraction of a technology or of a form

so large that it creates strong emotions in the minds of consumers.

Once attracted, sometimes a slightly disguised argument is likely

to be accepted.

If customers fall in love,

sales will be easier,

as simple as that.

So how to attract customers in a methodical way?

Marketing skills can be learned,

with this skill we have the tools to research customers

and find a scientific way to attract strong.


I carefully researched the characteristics of the negotiation,

including the cons/advantages of the personnel involved.

Even with opponents,

I look for their peculiarities

so that I can know what to avoid saying and what to do,

and also what to say and do.

Attraction does not necessarily require natural talent,

but it can simply be the result of a thorough preparation

and research according to methodical methods.

13. Good negotiators know how to buy and sell quickly,

and time is their friend

During my professional life,

I have met many people think that buying

and selling should not be rushed.

This is so true!

However, from then on they

thought that a lengthy negotiation was better than a quick conclusion.

This is not true in all cases.

When I negotiated with China

there were projects that were on the conference table

for three or four years,

but the Chinese side still showed no sign of wanting to conclude.

But it’s not our fault.

Meeting every few weeks and our side had to drop a bit,

then wait a few weeks before another meeting.

The other side must be thinking that

if we lower the price by 1% each session,

the 30 sessions will reduce the price by 30%.

Such reasoning is to see the negotiation purely as a game,

while the future of a major electricity project lies in wait for too long.

The game of the negotiating team does not go hand in hand

with the interests of the people.

However, one of the reasons for the Chinese side

to prolong the negotiations is

because they are afraid of drawing conclusions too quickly,

afraid of buying and selling.

So they buy time!

Such incidents force us to react to find solutions

to prevent time-consuming,

and we often prove that the price of the project cannot be lower,

and then withdraw to make room for others.


there is no better way to protect the price than to withdraw,

stop selling!

Of course,

you might think that doing so is clearing space for a rival company.

No, buddy.

When customers spend a year

and a month negotiating with your company,

they must have rated your product better than the products

of the competition.

On the other hand,

quick negotiation is not necessarily hasty negotiation,

because hurry is to lose.

But being quick means not letting the client see the negotiation as a joke,

drawing conclusions at any time,

and wasting time arbitrarily.

The fastest negotiation of my life lasted only a few days,

in Seoul, South Korea.

At that time the Korean company needed to buy a turbine to produce electricity.

We had information at that time that

the Korean side desperately needed this type of turbine,

but at that time in the world

there was only one available for sale,

otherwise customers would have to wait many months

to have more turbines to buy.

We offer a reasonable price,

if you say yes,

buy it now, otherwise we have customers

from other countries

who also urgently need this type of turbine.

In just a moment

they decided to immediately write the contract for the President to sign soon.

There’s no denying that slow decision-making has many advantages,

but if you’re a salesperson,

you should be smart to avoid letting time pass.

A good trade is still an early trade.

14. Good negotiators know how to buy low and sell high

When you go to buy or sell,

you should bring some documents,

articles with prices of products similar to your company’s products.

There is no information more convincing than the customer’s achievements.

Of course,

you should bring projects that are sold high or bought low.

Hide discounts or buys.

In many projects,

I even take customers to visit old customers

who have purchased our products.

The mentality of old customers is that

they will want to embellish your product,

for the simple reason that

they want to prove that

they have done a great job

by choosing your product wisely!

That proof is useful to their own internal

as well as to any external partners.

Needless to say,

after the visit,

you will find the customers you take on the tour convinced.

They will happily express their interest in buying the product.

They will try to contact old customers,

asking prices and terms in the contract.

They will use that to prove to their own collective

that doing so is serious.

Thanks to them,

you will be satisfied with the selling (or buying) price

and many other conditions in the contract.

15. Good negotiators know how to create pressure,

even fear,

in dialogue

There will always be times

when you get stuck in a negotiation.

At the end of the day,

you think your company still needs to buy

or sell the product under negotiation.

At the same time,

the intermediary tells you that

the customer is turning to the other’s product.

Before that critical moment,

you must react quickly.

The era of persuading

and seducing customers is over,

clearly not bringing the desired results.

So if customers don’t like sweets,

you have to “bomb” to save the situation!

In the electricity industry,

there are many cases of fire

or explosion in power plants.

There is also no shortage of turbines that

produce electricity “drinking combustible materials”

but the productivity is poor.

If your company’s competitors make the exact same mistake,

their hopes of hijacking the contract are slim.

You just need to give the intermediary “sensitive documents”

about the opponent and you’re done.

No investor would be crazy to buy bad stuff

when they have to spend tens of millions

or even hundreds of millions of dollars for a project.

In the railway industry,

especially high-speed rail,

customers will panic

when they hear the negotiating company’s train car derail.

In that situation,

of course,

the breakdown of one company opens the way for the other.

After all,

that’s normal.

There are many other situations that are potentially disruptive.

Which is the company about to go bankrupt,

or about to be bought.

Which is the project funding fund from the company’s country is in a hurry,

so the funding is difficult to disburse.

There are many continuous protests by unions,

workers …

All of these events are threatening on the project,

or at least on the advantage of the competing company!

If you know how to use the above information,

you will know how to overwhelm

and put pressure on customers.

More powerful is to cause fear.

There is no shortage of companies in the world making mistakes

in the business world.

Customers are most afraid of which company has lost its footing in a corruption case.

Once it has a reputation for corruption,

customers avoid it completely.

Fear is stronger than pressure,

because in a situation of pressure,

people still keep reason,

but in fear,

reason will give way to panic.

People no longer reason,

but only react wildly.

Whenever a customer enters a state of fear of a rival company’s product,

your hopes can rise!

However, my advice is that

you should not use fear as a weapon too indiscriminately.

Threats and scares are very boring,

easy to cause hatred later,

when the customer is fully satisfied

and aware that you have dared to look down on them.

* * *

Before ending this chapter,

I just want to reiterate the advice of an old engineer

when I was young:

“Always act with sincerity,

and boldly state your side when negotiating,

no need to hide it.

It is the simplest and most effective way of negotiating.

Of course,

that attitude does not always lead to victory,

but who is 100% successful in life?

It is important that after the negotiation,


and affection are also gained.

That’s what really means.

Honest negotiation does not guarantee success,

but it does guarantee success regardless of whether

the contract is signed or not.”

And I have to admit,

after nearly 40 years of negotiation,

that his colleague’s words are righteous!

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Angel Cherry

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