Overcome fear, open heart and start the journey
We always ask ourselves the question,
how to live the life we dream of,
forgetting the fact that despite the pain of such a life,
we are still hanging around,
chores so boring that it almost paralyzes the will
to struggle out of it.
We want to live differently
but still spend too much time watching TV every day,
indulge in fun parties to forget the date,
still accept to stick with a job that we don’t love, etc.
To have a good life.
Like a dream,
it’s not enough for you to just desire,
covet and do a few single actions,
because to live differently requires a combination of many factors.
Live the life you want,
author Pam Grout’s book teaches you how to change your attitudes,
and develop your hidden power
to reach your potential for success.
By thinking big,
dreaming big and asking big questions,
each of us is sure to make a difference in the lives of ourselves
and those around us.
Live the life you want will give you a lot of complete
and complete information
from the principles to live the life you want,
good examples of people living the life they want
to be very close close to us,
from disabled boys and girls,
prisoners of war in Vietnam
or even Mozart and Picasso.
Each chapter is devoted to practical questions and exercises
so that readers can practice applying it to their own lives.
Overcome your fear,
open your heart and start the journey!
Chapter 1: What is the great ideal?
Every day you receive many signals and invitations
to join a journey beyond any boundaries you have ever known.
You just need to overcome your fear,
open your heart and start the journey. — Bob Savino
Often people waste their imaginations,
hide their love and don’t fully understand the depths of their souls.
Or as the great poet Ranier Maria Rilke once said:
“Most people know only one corner of their room,
a path they follow every day.”
The book Live Life As You Want
It helps you discover the rest of your room.
We all know that people only use 10% of their meager intelligence.
What’s worse is that we use very little love,
perceive only a small part of our emotions,
and often withdraw from our biggest dreams.
If asked, I would answer
that the reason 5 out of 10 people in the US don’t like their jobs
and 17 million people suffer from depression is
because they live “not to the fullest extent of their lives”,
and ” They squeeze themselves into meaningless things.
that the average person has about 60,000 thoughts per day.
Pretty impressive statistic until you know it:
Only 2% of those 60,000 thoughts are different
from yesterday’s thoughts.
Think about what we can do if we use that 98% of our thoughts
to generate new ideas,
delve into the mysteries of life
or solve problems that the world is facing?
Most of us waste 60,000 of our thoughts on completely meaningless,
For example, look at the cover of a typical women’s magazine:
“Losing 3kg before Christmas”
“101 Ways to Regain Boost”
“How to satisfy that person in bed”
Don’t we have anything more interesting to read?
If instead, Ladies’
Home Journal’s seven million readers were all asking themselves,
“How can I hone my thinking”
or “How do I make school a place of love?”
big problems that we fear will be solved within a year.
7 million people focused on such issues will become an invincible force.
Instead, however, we focus on trivial matters.
We are only half alive.
If we can live to the fullest,
we can create many miracles.
We are completely ignorant of our power,
of the fact that the beating of the Divine heart is evident in our veins.
Instead of joyfully welcoming the new day,
we try to sleep in for another 15 minutes.
That is the source of all our problems.
Live Life As You Want It is a book about
how to access the remaining 90% of your brain,
cherish every little part of your soul,
and be ready for the wildest dreams.
I used to think that living the life you want meant being on the Late show
with David Letterman.
I used to worry that I would never find something
to inspire the producers when they called me.
I knew full well that I would never be an actor,
my chances of going to the Olympics were 1 in 285 million
and my pets would never be able to do any of it even if I did.
How hard to train.
And then I realized that once I looked more closely,
I found that a lot of the people
who appeared on the talk show weren’t as talented
as I thought they would be.
Yes, some of the TV actors we idolize are living the lives they want,
but a lot of them are just as small
and scared individuals as we are.
And similarly there are hundreds of people
whose names you have never heard of who are living great,
Live the life you want also telling stories
of simple people doing extraordinary things.
It brings visionaries,
who give up the comfort
and charm in a warm little house to have a different life.
They are participating in a modern-day crusade.
They save the world clean up polluted oceans,
preserve ancient cultures,
revive outdated political systems.
They aspire to bring a spirit of adventure
to a society that has almost forgotten how to smile.
However, there are people
who just want peace.
Although the mission
or vision is different,
the individuals in this book know how to appreciate life,
that “No” is not the right answer,
and that they can personally create difference.
Or at least an echo on this earth.
And although Live Life As You Want
It may seem like a book about heroes and other people,
it’s also a book about you.
About what might exist inside of you.
The individuals in this book don’t do things you can’t.
You need to remember that.
They simply accept and use their abilities.
I hope that their inspiration will serve
as the foundation for your own great life.
That their passion will help you find your life purpose and mission.
We all have a purpose and mission.
The first step to living the life we want is simply
to realize that it is possible,
to realize that people have repeatedly crossed their limits
to achieve extraordinary things.
So what does it mean to live the life you want?
Living the life you want is not about making a lot of money
or having a big house,
but having a vision that delights others,
daring to look at the miracle of life
instead of looking away from fear.
Living the life you want means having the courage
to find your own beat and sing your own song.
Unfortunately, many of us still march
to a song we learned decades ago.
Or we still sing along to the old song
that Madison Shopping Avenue composed
to entice us to buy their products.
If you haven’t looked far and wide,
you probably still think
that there are many things out there trying to control us.
Living life the way you want it
to mean going beyond mere control in life.
It is synonymous with flute dancing
while everyone else is doing the waltz.
It means showing concern
when you’re not sure how the other person feels.
It means stepping outside the little boxes
that paralyze our souls.
Living the life you want means having the courage
to speak your truth,
having the courage to read the poem written on your heart.
Read loud enough for everyone to hear.
We are all responsible for finding the passion
that makes us want to climb the table and dance.
The poet Walt Whitman once said it was the duty
of every individual
to write his own Bible.
My dream when I wrote the book Live the life you want was
that each of you would write not only your own Bible,
but also your own autobiography and dream list.
I want to know who you really are.
It is true that you are wearing a black leather jacket
and riding a motorbike like everyone else
but who are you behind all that?
What makes you jump
and scream with joy?
I want to know.
But more importantly you need to speak.
We all need to talk.
So the steps to live the life you want are quite simple:
* Find your passion.
* Run after your passion.
Instead of saying find your passion,
maybe I should say master your passion,
embrace it like you’re seeing a loved one again.
So a lot of us think we’ve figured it out,
but what makes us happy is still out there somewhere.
However, etched in your soul is a prepared script for your passion.
The point is not to go around to find it.
Or read a certain book,
hoping it will show you how to find it.
Let’s remove the outer layers
and see what is still there.
You know you’re close
when you feel a little euphoria,
when the very meaning of it makes you feel really excited.
Not to mention you won’t be scared.
Or you don’t feel like running away
when it’s time to execute your idea.
Fear is essentially a prerequisite of the soul.
I remember once telling a friend that for me,
to write a book about living the life
I want to like writing a book about Newton’s laws.
But then I thought to myself,
“What do I want to do more than anything else in the world?”
Live the life you want.
Accept your destiny.
Yes, there are impostors who are always trying
to convince me that I am small,
that my ideas don’t matter.
But there was another voice,
and this voice was louder.
That’s another part of living the life you want
– making a difference.
All my life I’ve talked about wanting
to spend my life working toward greater goals.
My greatest hope is that this book will make some impact
on the perception of the world.
If we limit ourselves only to the current rut,
we will never solve the problems of the world.
And there are so many problems to solve,
so many big things to do.
Now children are carrying guns to school.
Currently, tropical forests are being destroyed on a large scale.
Nowadays, there are people
who are so lonely that only Jay Leno is friends.
So I need to ask the question,
How are we going to do this?
We can’t just sit down,
press the remote and say,
“Wow, that’s unfortunate.”
We must act.
We have to go beyond our small,
shy and apathetic lives to take any action.
As long as there is prejudice,
the environment is still destroyed
and people still call each other by bad names.
We are not allowed
and cannot be small.
The answer to your problem
and the world’s is the same.
And that answer is you.
It is the present.
Chapter 2 : CHANGE YOUR OPINION, CHANGE YOUR LIFE.
The greatest discovery of my generation is that people can change their lives
by changing their perspective. —William James
Basically, the size of our lives is the result of our perspective.
Our perspective affects everything
to health to our thinking when solving crossword puzzles.
If we want to follow our passions
and live the life we want,
we have to improve our perspective.
Unfortunately, most of us live with opinions that limit us.
Perspectives make us small.
Humanities researcher Buckminster Fuller once said,
“We are held back
by the thoughts we are programmed to think.”
We accept our point of view
without giving it much thought.
We get it from our family,
or from the ubiquitous
“They say so” phrase.
We never even thought we could choose a different point of view.
The first perspective
we need to have is that our lives depend on ourselves.
We are responsible for designing our own lives.
Most of us believe that our main task in life is
to create boundaries,
identify what doesn’t fit,
and get rid of them.
People who treat us badly?
Parents don’t behave like Ward and June Cleaver?
This view completely negates who we really are.
It’s like signing a contract to buy a new home,
walking through the front door
and rushing out
because there’s no furniture in the house.
Only one person can furnish the house.
The ability to create the life you want is in your hands.
So we often get angry when we look at our lives and say,
“I deserve better than this.”
You deserve more than this.
But it is your own responsibility
to create “a better life than this.”
Yes, you may be in a bad relationship.
You have a wrong job.
However, who has the power to change these things?
Calling in a search team
to find the next guy, next job,
or next skill book is like calling the fire department
to blow out the candles on your birthday cake for you.
You don’t need the fire department.
You don’t even need a fire extinguisher.
You have enough power to blow out the candle.
You have the power
to fix everything that doesn’t make sense in your life.
First of all, you have to improve your perspective.
John F. Kennedy posed a challenge to American citizens:
“Ask not what your country can do for you,
but what you can do for your country.”
That’s the essence of living the life you want.
Don’t ask what life can do for you,
ask what you can do with your life.
Living the life you want
is about finding your potential in the present.
It means telling yourself,
“I accept what I have.
And this is what I can do with what I have.”
Accept what you have.
Accept the relationships you have.
Accept the work you are doing.
Accept the house you live in.
And turn them into beautiful things.
We must regain our strength.
We must say,
“I am a man overflowing with love,
a man of strength and power,
and nothing in my life cannot be fully restored.
It is all up to me,
and only me,
to make that happen.”
Chapter 3 : OPERATION PRINCIPLES
The illusion that is confused
with the truth is the pavement beneath our feet. — Barbara Kingsolver
In the chapters that follow,
I will present 7 BIG perspectives that serve as second nature of people
who live the life they want.
The good news is,
these are the views you once had.
These are the views that emerge from your childhood,
the views that are ingrained in you.
Live life the way you want it
to argue that childhood views are the big,
important things in life,
views we all had
before we were taught to get dirty and jump,
bed is wrong.
Let’s go back to childhood
when anything was possible.
When we learn to “stop laughing”
before being taught to “be on the lookout,”
“be careful” or “stay away from strangers.”
Aside from drinking eight glasses of water a day,
most of the “they say” is wrong.
Or at least irrelevant,
and ineffective for living life the way you want it to.
Marianne Williamson tells the story of a little girl
who submitted a picture of a purple tree to her teacher.
That teacher said,
“I have never seen a purple tree.”
The girl replied, “I’m sorry. Pity.”
And although it’s “sorry” that
you may also have forgotten about the purple trees
and the meaning behind them,
“it’s good” that you’re here and ready
to remember those things.
1. Think Big :
A Perspective on Boldness,
or Why It’s Not Necessary to “Be Careful.”
Before starting school,
most of us have heard the saying “Be careful” hundreds of times.
Basically, it’s the instruction a mother needs
to warn her every time her child runs into the gym,
joins the soccer team,
or goes after the guy she likes.
Instead, we should encourage children to ignore caution.
“Let’s get out.”
“Take a risk.” “Do something to embarrass yourself.”
Caution doesn’t help us.
If Martin Luther King, Jr. cautiously,
he never had a dream about a day
when people wouldn’t be judged by the color of their skin.
If Christopher Columbus had been cautious,
he would never have made it to the New World.
Anyway, to his parents’ understanding,
the world was flat
and he was in danger of falling off the edge.
The 1st perspective on Living the life you want is think big
or take a bold perspective.
People who live their lives the way they want to are not cautious.
They did not settle down.
They don’t feel like they have
to do something as simple as their parents did.
Or because someone else does.
People who live their lives the way
they want don’t care what other people think.
Like Nike says, they “just do it.”
2. Giving a lot :
Perspectives on helping,
or why there’s no need to “always look for number one.”
“They say” must always pay attention before and after,
must protect their own space.
But ironically the defining,
turning point of the Great Men in this book
is the moment they decide to
“get over themselves.”
Andrea Campbell met 20 disabled children
from Russia while sitting in the doctor’s office
“Well, what do I have to worry about?”
As for Patch Adam,
it was a feeling of empathy
for a lonely guy without friends.
James Twyman outdoes himself
when working with homeless AIDS victims.
The 2rd perspective on living life
as you want is giving a lot
or helping perspective.
It’s about being able to give everything you have
without expecting anything in return.
You don’t have to have extraordinary intelligence
or extraordinary talent
to be important.
However, you have to get over the banal thinking that
“looking for number one” is a wise move.
3. More Blessing :
A Perspective on Kindness,
or Why You Should “Chat With Strangers.”
Since learning to walk,
we’ve always been taught to stay away
from people we don’t know.
“They say” it’s best to be cautious
until we get a letter of recommendation.
After all, according to them,
“there are a lot of crazy people out there.”
But you know, 99.9% of the people in this world are really kind.
For every lunatic on the news,
5,000 people are willing to give you their coats.
When we appear suspicious,
distrustful and unwilling to converse with strangers,
we only promote suspicion and distrust,
furthermore we miss the opportunity
to meet a great group of friends.
So, in my opinion,
“Let’s chat with strangers.”
In fact, chat until no one is a stranger.
If you need a letter of recommendation
then please use my letter below
LETTER OF INTRODUCTION FOR
(You can fill in the blanks with names like Tom,
Dick or Harry, whatever.
I don’t care if the person is homeless,
disabled or incarcerated.)
Najmul is a good man.
With a little love and empathy,
he/she can do great things.
Sure he/she may have made some mistakes,
maybe done some stupid actions,
but he/she still has a lot of love to give and a lot of ideas
to change the world.
Love this person by all means.
Consider him/her” as a friend
and confidant as soon as possible.
Do not wait.
There’s nothing to worry about.
This person is a treasure.
The 3rd view of Living life as you wish is the blessing or kindness view.
It means connecting with others.
Spread love and kindness.
Each of us has been assigned a place in the vast cosmic garden.
We can happily tend it or watch the weeds grow.
4.Make a Difference :
A Perspective on Commitment,
or Why You Shouldn’t “Watch Too Much TV.”
This is perhaps the biggest barrier to a happy and fulfilling life.
This is passivity.
We become spectators instead of doers.
Recent studies show that Americans are, on average,
three to four times more likely to sit
and watch television in the evening
than they are to chat with family and friends.
Waiting time is from 4 to 6 hours.
That time makes up 1/3 of our waking time.
I don’t mean to offend anyone,
but watching too much TV is the most
useless thing I’ve ever seen.
And so, little by little,
we give up our legacy.
We give up the ability to think for ourselves,
and to dream.
Within each of us is a master chef,
writer and leader.
All the heroes,
giants that exist in our souls are tired of having
to witness “every day of our lives.”
Maybe we all know about every famine in Africa,
the results of every sporting event
and every detail of the latest crime.
But what do we do?
“Just sitting and watching TV.”
An Amish woman from Southern Pennsylvania
once told a pollster about modern amenities:
“We don’t want televisions
because they keep us from visiting our neighbors.
How can we care about each other
if we don’t know our neighbors?”
The 4th element of Living your life the way you want it
to is making a big change
or a commitment perspective.
It means choosing an ideal, leaving a legacy.
It means standing up and taking action,
believing in the power of an individual to make a difference.
5. Rich Imagination :
A perspective on creativity,
or why you should never “Go in line.”
The problem with this much-talked-about advice is
that no one knows where the line is.
And the pretenders are definitely showing you their way.
So that’s good for them.
But that’s not your line.
Almost anything is possible
and you are free to use any instructions you choose.
But there is no way.
French naturalist John Henry Fabre performed an interesting experiment
on the moth Thaumetopoea pityocampa.
They lined up and marched with their eyes closed.
It doesn’t matter if the first one is approaching the cliff
or under the tire.
The docile little caterpillars always follow the line.
Fabre filled a large flower pot with soil.
Around the wall of the pot,
he placed 15 caterpillars.
they followed each other in a circle until it was impossible
to tell which one was first
and which one was behind.
In the center of the flower pot,
he placed a lot of pine needles,
the main food source of the caterpillars.
Unfortunately, the caterpillars marched in circles for 7 days
and 7 nights
until they passed out from hunger and exhaustion.
I think that’s what we’ve been doing.
We forget who is the leader and who is the follower.
I don’t mean to blame anyone
but perhaps following the line is leading us into a purposeless,
We need to step out of the line
and show who we really are.
The 5th perspective of living life
as you want it is the rich imagination
or creation perspective.
On the day you were born,
God gave you the ability to create.
That’s the ability the whole world needs.
Rich imagination means opening the door to magic,
profound possibilities that fill your soul.
6. Get Involved:
A Perspective on Happiness,
or Why You Should Never “Stop Laughing.”
“They say” we shouldn’t allow ourselves
to be distracted by stupidity.
Our job is to “work” and “contribute
to the development of the country.”
Silly, they say, is a waste of precious time.
I replied, “Lo-to-to.”
In fact, we need more than stupidity,
we need to be willing to make ourselves look more like weirdos.
The word silly comes from the Middle English word sillig which means “happy.”
If we were all willing to do three silly things every day,
like put on the left side of our jackets
or sing loudly in traffic jams on the freeway,
we would surely get more happiness.
We will be liberated to forge new paths,
find new adventures.
As people who live the life we want,
we are not here to do things that have already been accomplished.
Maybe we should all relax a little bit
and take our dreams to a silly star.
The sixth aspect of living life as you want it is full engagement,
or as i call it the happiness perspective.
It means seeing life as a great adventure,
treating each day as an exciting and unusual experience.
7. Love more :
It doesn’t matter if you have a soulful perspective,
or why you “always wear clean underwear” or not.
There is a small problem with this advice.
Clean underwear focuses on material things.
It implies that if you have the right underwear
or the right furniture or the right car,
somehow life will become easier.
In case you don’t understand,
material things don’t bring us happiness.
In fact, I would venture
to say that the blind pursuit of material things
is what makes us unhappy and stressed.
No matter what kind of underwear you wear,
it makes no difference.
What matters is the dream written on your heart
and how much love
and compassion you can spread to others.
The final view of living life as you wish is loving much or soul view .
You are not helping anyone by playing a small role.
Loving a lot means realizing
who you really are and why you exist.
THERE’S MORE …
To each point of view, I added 3 sections:
Biographies of People Who Lived the Life They Wanted,
3 Big Questions, and Soul Training Camp.
People who live the life they want:
Without a doubt, a small team of compacted citizen can change the world.
That is the only thing that ever changes the world. — Margaret Mead
Those who want to paint, learn from Picasso.
Those who want to play the piano learn from Mozart.
We, who want to live the life we want,
from the people who live the life we want.
Throughout history thousands of people have plucked up the courage
to pursue their own vision.
People like Mary Colte,
a revolutionary architect
who started her business in 1902, 18 years before women had the right to vote.
People like Osseola McCarty,
who has raised hundreds of thousands of dollars in college scholarships
for African-American children.
People like Jimmie Davis,
who briefly served as governor
of Louisiana and successful western and country songwriters.
People like C. J. Walker,
who became America’s first female millionaire by manufacturing
and selling hair care products.
Living the life you want means joining a powerful brotherhood.
That is facing Joan of Arc, Michael Jordan,
That is, following Shakespeare,
Rumi, and Oprah Winfrey,
who once said,
“I always knew I was a big star waiting for my time.”
That means joining a group that includes a lot of proud members
from anywhere and at any time.
The people who live the life
they want to be in this book are still living.
They are the people
I met during my time as a reporter.
There’s someone I know well.
Some people I just read biographies in magazines.
Others, I just follow them because they inspire me
to “make my life extraordinary.”
All are great examples of what is possible.
Scientists understand the importance of examples of learning and behavior.
A semanticist named Alfred Korzybski called this ability
to learn from others “time bound.”
Knowledge gained from others binds us together,
if one person can do it, so can we.
You’ve probably heard of the 100th Monkey Theory.
Monkeys on a remote island have mastered the method
of picking bananas from trees.
Before long, monkeys on other islands also
began picking bananas in this way,
although they had no contact
with the first monkeys to master the method.
This theory holds that if enough members of a group
(in this case 100 monkeys) acquire a new knowledge or skill,
it will be unconsciously transferred into the group
and all members will acquire that knowledge or skill.
When one of us increases the voltage
then we all see more clearly.
Those who can quickly tap into the knowledge of others
and who can acquire new skills,
and new behaviors will gain an important advantage in life.
Martin Luther King, Jr. study Gandhi’s life.
Many of Gandhi’s great ideas came
from Tolstoy. Robert E. Lee imitates George Washington.
The Wright brothers were inspired
by a French inventor. John Wooden,
a former volleyball coach at the University of California,
says that Purdue University volleyball coach Ward “Piggy” Lambert
taught him everything he knows.
Einstein learned from Newton
and Newton learned from Galileo. And so on.
We are all connected.
Being able to decide to live life the way you want it
to be becomes a decision that changes the balance.
Maybe you are the 100th monkey.
3 big questions
Find the best things in yourself. — Lundbergh
Sam Keen once said that the quality of life
is directly proportional to the questions we ask.
If we ask important questions,
we will get important answers.
The universe will bring us many questions,
will answer everything we ask.
So why not ask big questions, think big thoughts?
Ask the question “What if?” daily.
Instead of asking,
“How am I going to spend this salary
for the rest of the month?”
we should ask,
“What can I bring to the table that makes me
so happy that I can sing?”
Instead of asking
“What was the closing price of the Janus Worldwide fund?”
or “How much is the filet at Safeway?”
then we can ask,
“How can I become a loving,
inspiring person to others?”
For each Big Perspective,
I’ll pose three Big Questions,
what I call magic questions.
I hope you will spend some time thinking about these Big Questions.
Everything is possible,
but we have to imagine it first.
The more big questions we ask,
the more we dare to say,
“What will it look like?”
and we will become even greater.
Putting your attention on something makes it real.
We can truly reshape and redesign our lives
by asking bigger questions.
Soul training camp
To change your life:
do it outstandingly;
no exceptions . — William James
I know what you’re thinking.
You want to read a book,
want something to put on the bookshelf.
But if you really want to live the life you want,
you have to take action.
You have to do something.
In fact, the fundamental problem
with inspirational books
(yes, including this one)
is that they are read while sitting down.
The only thing these books require is mental activity.
Do not misunderstand me.
A rich and profound spiritual life is the number one key
to opening the life you want.
But once you start asking
and answering the big questions,
you can’t help but get up
and become a greater person.
Living the life you want means taking action.
Good news here.
Soul training camp,
if practiced with discipline,
is guaranteed to remove any calluses from your heart.
It is guaranteed to change every petty behavior.
Take simple actions at the end of each chapter
for a set number of days
and you’ll be out of your rut forever.
As a training sergeant,
I have to warn you first:
Soul training camp has some pretty bold requirements.
At first, they may seem a bit outrageous,
but they’re not.
All of the Training Camp exercises are things we should do anyway,
things we shouldn’t need a reminder book to do.
Some of the requests may seem intimidating at first.
Who wants to break out of old habits,
especially if it means conversing with strangers
and making fun of themselves?
But I guarantee that if you follow through,
the boredom and sluggishness will disappear.
Your life will become fun and interesting.
You will become someone who lives the life you want.
There’s nothing a normal person can’t do.
In fact, the big surprise is that the average person hasn’t done these things yet.
The exercises in the Training Camp are all free of charge.
No exercise takes too long.
You don’t even need to wake up at 5am.
All you need is a willingness to do something ‘out of the ordinary’.
Isn’t that what we are finding boring,
Well, I know maybe you would rather write some affirmations,
visualize some more goals,
and voice some positive thoughts.
But Living life the way you want it to be is a completely different brand.
It certainly doesn’t look like your mom’s Oldsmobile car.
But keep in mind.
Once you’re out,
once you’ve completed the basic training you’ll be
so amazed at your new self that you wonder
why you didn’t do this ten years ago.
You will become happier, more energetic,
and more certain of who you are.
Freedom comes with risks,
stepping outside the small line that society considers “normal.”
it’s Living the life you want.
You should fasten your seat belt.
Or better yet, remove your seat belt.
Let’s open the window.
“Hey, here I am and I’m ready to live the life I want!”
The time for the trip of your life has arrived.
CHAPTER 3 : Think Big: A Perspective on Courage
In the present view,
not daring to dream bold dreams turns out to be irresponsible. — George Leonard
When you were five years old,
you knew you were the Queen of Sheba.
In your head,
you have no doubt
that you will do great things and your life is very important.
You march around the house like a brave human being
and harass your parents,
forcing them to look at you.
Unfortunately, at some point between the ages of 7 and 13,
most of us stop doing so and decide to go shopping.
Living the life you want means regaining that 5 year old audacity.
It means finding the courage to stand up and say,
“Here.” You must be brave in your actions.
Be bold in your dreams.
And remember that you are capable of anything.
Believing in anything else is self-denial.
Some may object and think that boldness is brazen,
that humility is the virtue to strive for.
Yet humility is just a pretense that we learn.
Robert Fulghum’s famous essay
I Learned All I Know Since Kindergarten was recently adapted into a play.
In the first scenes,
the kindergarten teacher asks her new students
who the dancers are:
“I. I.” They all shouted excitedly.
“And how many are singers?” the teacher asked.
Once again all raised their hands.
Lots of hands waving.
Add more arms.
In fourth grade,
another teacher asked the same questions
to the same number of students.
Now only a third of students want to be dancers,
In high school, the number of students
who are willing to admit their artistic talents
can only be counted on the fingers.
So where did their confidence and enthusiasm go?
or teachers may have said
that they are not painters.
Some aptitude tests with fancy names give official scores
that say students should give up their wishful thinking
of becoming a writer.
Try an accounting career.
Some counselors report that only certain people have artistic abilities.
From an early age,
we try to control things beyond ourselves.
The coach tells us if we’re good enough
to make it to the baseball team.
Music teachers tell us if we have the talent to sing in choirs.
Teachers give us certain grades
so that we know if we are smart enough to get a good grade,
smart enough to get into college.
The art teacher makes a rule:
The grass is green, the sky is blue.
Why do we listen to that?
How does anyone know what color your grass is?
How does anyone know what note you want to sing on?
They know what’s right for them.
But how do they know what is right for you?
Only you know that.
And you know well.
You don’t need a seminar,
By stepping forward,
even if you’re not sure you’re ready,
you will find inspiration,
Your path will become clear.
Sometimes we feel doubtful about our purpose,
not sure what we want,
and that’s because we’re too shy
to get out of our rigid “turtle shell”.
When we are bold,
when we dare to challenge the status quo,
in ourselves and in others,
the answers to all our questions appear in the blink of an eye.
Courage is simply declaring who you are.
Say it out loud,
“Look what I can do!” simply acknowledge the real you.
I’m not great because I’m Pam Grout, writer,
tennis player, 177cm tall mother from Kansas.
I am great because I am human,
part of a noble
and proud tribe that includes members like Gandhi,
Shakespeare and Martin Luther King, Jr.
The heartbeats of Picasso and Thomas Edison also beat inside of me.
Any of us can be anyone we are brave enough to admit.
That’s why we see many people with paralysis of both limbs
still drawing beautiful pictures
or brushing their own teeth.
That’s why we see many blind people
still skiing in the mountains.
The only thing holding us back is ourselves.
Opportunities appear from all sides.
But many of us are too shy to see them.
When we refuse to be brave,
when we forget to say “I’m important,”
we should give up.
life is just a rote lesson.
When Walt Disney was in elementary school,
a teacher stared intently at the flowers he had scrawled in the margins,
patted the boy on the shoulder,
and said, “Hey Walk, these flowers are beautiful,
but flowers are absent.”
Walt turned around,
looked the teacher straight in the eye,
and announced loudly, “My flowers are.”
This is the courage we need in life.
We need to refuse to listen to anyone
or anything but the urges in our souls.
As with Walt Disney,
his flowers are definitely present.
In Alice in Wonderland,
his 18th animated film,
flowers are not only present,
but also voice,
and choir that captivates Alice with the song:
“In the Golden Afternoon.”
People who live the life they want. — Samuel Mockbee
If we can build the present, we will survive.
We must challenge the status to have a better future. — Samuel Mockbee
Samuel Mockbee was successful.
He owns an architecture firm.
Many of his designs have won prestigious awards.
He is involved in many international projects.
He has enough spare time to draw and pursue other interests.
However, something bigger was calling to him.
As the fifth generation of Alabama,
he understands the dilemmas of race
and poverty in his state.
And while many of us would shrug our shoulders and say,
“It’s a pity, but what can I really do?”
Mockbee brings its ability
– out to help.
As a professor at Auburn University,
Mockbee not only wanted to put money
and time invested where he cared,
but also wanted to make sure that his first love
– architecture – was used to a noble cause.
He started Rural Studio to help students understand the essence of architecture.
He believes that people should live in harmony with their surroundings.
He believes that architecture can satisfy social values
as well as technical and artistic values.
The idea for Rural Studio arose in 1993
when Mockbee was frustrated
by student projects built only to be demolished,
he had a bigger idea.
Why not build real houses where people can use them?
Why waste time thinking up theoretical designs
when we could use that time designing more useful things?
He and his students headed to Hale County, Alabama,
one of the poorest counties in America,
where 36% of the population lives below the poverty line.
Surely they might need some unique housing ideas.
maybe we can build their homes
with innovative architecture at the same time?
Who knows, maybe we can build our own homes
for those who can’t afford it for free?
Needless to say,
one needs to think outside the box
to come up with such an idea.
And in fact,
Mockbee and his students completely broke the rules inherent
in building houses.
Instead of following the old rule that
“Houses are made of wood,
brick and stone”,
they come up with creative designs,
using novel construction materials such as old tires,
and even discarded license plates.
who had lived in subprime homes all their lives now own homes
that are not only safe and warm,
but are also referred to by Mockbee as “houses with a soul.”
A home, as Mockbee says,
should be a refuge for both mind and body.
His students do everything themselves
– from design to nailing.
They spent almost the entire semester living in this impoverished district
even though it was only an hour’s drive from the nearest movie theater.
Mockbee thinks Rural Studio is a far cry
from the usual college life where you go to class
with other students a few times a week.
At Rural Studio, they live together,
eat together and create amazing homes together.
The studio was built from a farmhouse dating back
to the 90s of the 18th century.
Over the years, Mockbee students have built churches,
and several homes including an 80 square meter house made of hay.
Alberta and Shepard Bryant,
the two proud owners of this new home,
used to live with their three grandchildren
in a run-down shack with no plumbing
until Mockbee and his students showed up.
The students also built smokehouses
from shredded concrete slabs and colored glass.
For just $20,
the smokehouse where Shepard smokes fish is truly beautiful
as the light shines through the colorful glass.
As Mockbee puts it,
“We turn the ordinary into the extraordinary.”
His purpose? “I just want to jump into the dark and see where I land.”
That is the only way.
People who live the life they want. — Bruce Poon Tip
Leave no footprints, leave a legacy
I was born to be an adventurer.
That’s for sure.
I cannot do anything to make myself happy. — Roy Chapman Andrews
Ten years ago when Bruce Poon Tip decided
to start his own adventure travel agency,
he decided or could focus on the fact that the 23-year-old was,
essentially, just a “baby” in the eyes of others,
most potential customers.
Or he could focus on the fact that he had just been fired
from the only two jobs he had ever had
– the one at Denny’s when he was 16
and at McDonald’s a few months later.
Or you may remember
that with the business you tried,
the company that sold bookmarks
with weather forecasts was shut down
by the principal himself
because all his classmates had dropped out of school to do it.
But instead of “facing reality,”
the brave entrepreneur said,
“I knew I could” and set out to build a company
that would later become a leader in the burgeoning travel industry. .
Poon Tip’s Toronto-based G.A.P Adventures not only tops in sales
($16 million last year and consistently ranks on Canada’s Profit 100 list,
a ranking of the fastest-growing companies. )
but also implements the philosophy of social responsibility it promotes.
“Leave no footprints”,
the popular mantra of ecotourism operators,
is not enough for G.A.P.
Yes, Poon Tip limits the number of tourists per trip to 12,
uses only public transport
– train, horse, canoe
– and selects only motels and guest houses,
that his “footprint” made a tangible change in the lives
of the people he worked with.
Thanks to the Poon Tip,
the Pimpilala Indians,
a small tribe living in the rainforests of Ecuador,
were able to purchase the sacred land of the tribe.
Not only did this tribe not have to live off of cutting firewood,
but they were also able to prevent mining
and oil from ravaging their land.
All G.A.P clients have the opportunity to “adopt” a child
from the country they visit.
And if the tours don’t follow Poon Tip’s social,
and environmental guidelines,
he’ll get rid of them no matter how successful they are.
The gorilla trail tour to Uganada,
one of Poon Tip’s most popular tours, was canceled
because it was clear the tour operators he worked
with didn’t take his principles seriously.
he withdrew from Burma
when some government agencies did not instruct him
to work directly
with local people through intermediaries for profit.
At the office,
Poon Tip also lives by noble point of view.
All 75 employees start work
with a 4-week vacation.
Everyone gets one free travel per year.
And in keeping with the low-impact philosophy,
each employee receives a free bus pass
or is encouraged to walk,
printed paper is used on both sides,
and Poon Tip pays almost twice as much
for branded coffee. fair trade.
Poon Tip’s decision to live life the way he wants came
from his travels to Thailand.
“First of all, the expensive five-star car tour makes me believe
that in Thailand there are many rich people
and many luxury hotels.
The next time,
I went “backpacking” at $5 a day
and found small villages and hill tribes.
I see a real Thailand.
I realized that on my first trip,
I was stuck in a Western environment.
I thought maybe other people wanted to see what I saw too.”
You were right.
The company grew with exponential revenue within 10 years.
And while it may rest,
Poon Tip has just launched an adventure drama series
based on a 10-day trip through Borneo at the Bampf film festival.
Young, brave and unwilling to follow the path,
Poon Tip is a man of great vision
and he has contributed
to making the world more beautiful.
He is a consultant for the World Bank in Washington
and his convictions won him the Ethics in Action award last year.
Poon Tip made a difference,
left a legacy,
made the world a better place.
People who live the life they want.
Help Annie Oakley sing the song
“You can do anything…”
In life, we don’t have a lot of opportunities
to create change
so should take them as opportunities,
instead of barriers.— Bev Sanders
When Bev Sanders was in high school,
her father let her do an office job at his driving school.
“Forget about college,” he said.
Girls do not need higher education.
What will you use your degree
for after you get married?”
Although he loved his father very much
and understood that he had the old-fashioned views
of the previous generation,
Bev left his shirt and chose the path to the west.
She found a job teaching skiing at Lake Tahoe,
a passion she had since childhood.
That brave act, the decision to give up old-fashioned thinking,
set her own path and step into the new world created the premise
for a life as she wanted it to be.
Not only did she set up one of the first companies
to design and manufacture snowboards,
but she did her best to change the way women see themselves
– especially in sports.
“Look at the advertising,” she said.
To this day, 99% of ads show men playing sports.
Where are the women?
My mission is to level the playing field.”
Even with her own company,
a business she co-founded in 1982 with her husband,
Chris, getting people to know women’s skiing needs
is fraught with obstacles.
She had to work very hard to convince Chris
and the other designers to create skateboards for women.
She also worked tirelessly
to get $20,000 in initial mold making costs.
Even the most passionate female skiers say,
“This is what my boyfriend said I should try.”
Finally, after much determination,
Bev convinced Avalanche to launch Sanders 148,
the first snowboard designed specifically for women.
In just one year,
it received the award for best freestyle skateboard
and created a trend in producing skateboards specifically for women.
“People often tell me you are just a small individual,” she said.
How can you influence the whole world?
I believe I can.”
She certainly influenced the sport of skiing.
When she and Chris started designing snowboards on the back of napkins,
skiing was still a “rebellious” sport.
Most ski areas do not allow snowboarding on the slopes.
Bev and Chris had to try to find a place to “test” their product.
Of course, snowboarding is ubiquitous these days,
and in 1998, 16 years after Bev first firmly believed
that snowboarding was possible,
it became a sport in the world.
However, she and Chris sold the company in 1995.
“When MTV started showing snowboarding,
I knew it was over for me,” she said.
Maybe the clothing company GAP also sells skis.”
Her current passion is the all-girls surf school
she founded on the northern beach of Puerto Vallarta, Mexico.
According to Bev, called Las Olas Surf Safari,
the company’s mission is
to empower women through surfing and snowboarding.
“Women stick together in a special way,” she said.
I especially enjoy seeing the appearance of businesswomen.
Within 24 hours they were all mixed up,
I always joked that
I was running a complete school in the opposite direction
because I turned women into girls.”
The seven-day program,
described as a mix of a girls’ slumber party
with an empowerment workshop,
combines yoga and massage with daily surf lessons.
For Bev, it’s a way to help women reclaim their power.
“We need strong women,” she said.
Women are the ones who will stand up for the environment,
will do what needs to be done.
We need the power of women to change the world.”
After years of snowboarding,
Bev discovered his passion for surfing through his courage.
She and Chris booked a plane ticket to Milan.
When the plane sold out,
the two went to the next counter
and there was a flight to Maui.
“We don’t even have swimwear,” she said.
We checked into the hotel,
I checked the phone book
and saw in the yellow pages an advertisement
for a dog on a surfboard.
The ad says:
“If dogs can surf, so can you.”
We went to buy surfboards and returned after 7 days.
That changed my life.
“I feel honored to be the initiator of two different things:
first to snowboard and now to bring more women to the sport.
Our way of life requires new thinking. — Albert Einstein
Have you ever wondered if anyone wants
to do unimportant and uninteresting things?
However, let’s see how we spend our time.
Look at the headlines in the magazines we read.
Let’s look at the TV shows we are addicted to watching.
We think we care about things
that we don’t really care about.
I don’t want to be the one to tell you this
but you really don’t care what perfume you’re wearing,
you know the secret of 60 minutes of orgasm.
You care about what happens to our children.
To our ocean.
To the beautiful American dream of freedom,
and unlimited possibilities.
You care about your soul,
about how you make a difference in the world.
Yet somehow, we get lost.
I don’t know why that happened.
I’m not even sure we need to know.
Why we get lost is one of those unrelated issues
that we spend so much time understanding.
It doesn’t matter at all.
The only thing that matters is:
“How do we get back on track?”
How can we shift our focus away from trivial
and unimportant things to bring it to the right place?
When we focus on less important issues,
we give up on who we really are.
This is a big broblem.
That’s why the pharmaceutical company Eli Lilly makes a lot of money
from the antidepressant Prozac.
That’s why an average of 40 people commit suicide in an hour.
We are all stupid false saints.
We pretend to care about things we don’t care about.
It doesn’t matter how much money you make
or what car you drive.
You do not care.
It’s like when we play “pretend to believe” just sometimes
we forget it’s just pretend.
The only thing you really care about is
how you can make a difference in the world,
how you can share the love with your brothers and sisters.
We all recognize this fact,
whether we admit it or not.
It’s still that little voice that constantly nudges us in the ribs,
the discontent within us
when we pause long enough to ask ourselves,
“Is that all?”
The little voice will never be silent.
It’s like a rabbit battery.
You cannot escape it.
So why don’t we put our arms down,
surrender and admit it.
We all really love each other.
We all want to do great things.
We can save our world.
It’s never too late.
3 big questions
I always tell myself what is the most important
that we can think in this magical time. — R. Buckminster Fuller
Before Native Americans made important decisions,
they asked themselves:
“How will this decision affect my children
and the next seven generations?”
When it comes to making important decisions,
most of us just want to know how it affects our bank accounts.
Perhaps instead of that,
we should ask the following questions:
1. What would I do if I knew I couldn’t fail?
2. How can I step outside the small line that society considers “normal?”
3.What can I do today to bring clarity
and wonder to my perception?
Soul training camp
Make fun of yourself at least once a day
Humans need a kind of craziness,
otherwise one will never dare
to cut the rope to be free. — Nikos Kazantzakis
Exercise: Every day for the next 7 days,
do something you have never done
and something that you feel you simply cannot do.
How many times have you had a good idea just to keep
to yourself for fear of looking like a freak?
How many times have you wanted to run up and hug someone
and tell them you love them
but you didn’t
because you were afraid they wouldn’t feel the same way?
Or they might think you’re the crazy person that “people” warned about.
It’s wrong to be afraid of looking silly.
Worrying about what others think will only spoil your joy
and the good ideas our planet needs.
The solution to this “disease” is to force yourself to do silly things.
who starred in the movie Double Jeopardy with Ashley Judd,
said: “I used to be very insecure.
I faced my fear by doing things
that made me feel uncomfortable.” C.W.Metcalf,
a humor consultant to many Fortune 500 companies,
said he cured himself of a “serious terminal illness”
by forcing himself to do things like go to the airport
without being present with shoes or socks.
Or stand in an elevator and talk nonstop.
Pay attention to your reaction.
Do you find yourself thinking,
“I will never be able to do that!”
Don’t worry, it’s this resistance that gets you stuck.
Your exercise is to do something silly every day for the next 7 days.
One thing you’re sure of “I could never do.”
And must be open to others.
And it has to be something out of the ordinary,
something that can make people laugh.
But, but… what if the other person laughs?
a seventeenth-century physicist, once said:
“The appearance of a good clown
will have more beneficial effects on the health of the townsfolk
than 20 full-loaded donkeys. ”
Everyone likes to laugh.
They need to laugh.
According to Patch Adams,
“People crave laughter
as much as they crave essential amino acids.”
And since everyone on the planet wants
to get out of the rut just like you,
they’re sure to enjoy your madness.
And they will certainly be jealous,
wishing it was them.
But I guarantee that they will not abandon you.
You might even inspire them.
Everyone longs for someone who allows them to be themselves.
Maybe you are that person.
Chapter 4: Giving a lot: perspective on helping
We are tourists on this planet… during the travel period,
we must try to do something good,
useful with our lives. —Dalai Lama
A vacation on the Riviera,
a Chrysler PT Cruiser,
or an anti-aging cream isn’t the secret to happiness.
There is only one thing
that can open the door to inner peace.
Make a purpose bigger than the face you see in the mirror every day.
Give everything you have to create a better,
brighter and more beautiful world.
Most of us don’t know how to give.
We live with a secret exchange system.
You do this and I will do that.
You scratch my back, I’ll scratch your back.
Whether you admit it or not,
we all give what we hope to receive in return.
It doesn’t have to be money.
Many of us seek appreciation,
or a pearl necklace from Tiffany’s.
But as long as we keep that kind of scorecard,
we’ll get bogged down in fear.
When you live your life expecting someone else
to do something for you,
even if it’s just perceiving everything like you,
you’re acting like a victim.
You are receiving,
True giving also means giving up the role of the victim.
“But I’m not a victim!”
Every time you deny your responsibility in any situation,
you are playing the victim.
If you’ve ever believed that someone,
or some objective reason made you do a certain thing,
you’re playing the victim.
Take a look at the statements below.
“I can’t. That’s who I am.”
“You don’t know my childhood was terrible.”
“I’m fed up.”
“Why does this always happen to me?”
My life will never be the same.”
“The world is crazy these days.”
“Humans are so insensitive.”
You need to “grow up and get ahead of yourself.”
When we truly become great to serve,
to give without expectation,
our sense of personal power,
peace of mind,
and our capacity to love
and trust There will also be major changes.
Albert Schweitzer is a perfect example.
He is a famous organist,
writer and expert on Bach.
But when he read about his poor health in Africa,
he couldn’t “live for himself” anymore.
He enrolled in medical school,
despite the opinions of family and friends,
who thought he was crazy
to give up his successful career to go to Africa.
“You are unreasonable.
Britain should stay in Europe.
You can donate money for medical care here.”
But he replied:
“We should not ask whether a purpose is reasonable.
We must act on our inner urge.”
The urge inside him said, “Go.”
He founded the Lambarene Medical Center
in the only building he could find
– a chicken coop.
In just 9 months,
he treated 2,000 patients.
For the next 50 years,
he worked in the forests of Africa,
saving lives and inspiring millions of others.
Even when he won the Nobel Peace Prize in 1953,
he used the $33,000 prize to set up a leper colony.
He repeatedly said that as long as there is
still even one person who is hungry,
lonely or living in illness,
that person will be his responsibility.
“People have to find their inner urge,” he said.
People who live the life they want. – Mary Guthrie
Her passionate love creates miracles.
I hate the rules.
I am the world’s worst rule-follower.—Mary Guthrie
If anyone had reason
to feel sorry for themselves,
it was Mary Guthrie.
She joked that in high school, she was supposed
to be “definitely going to reformatory.”
She ran away from home to follow her lover at the same schoo
l when she was 16 years old.
Her second child died of sudden death syndrome SIDS at the age of 2 months.
The sudden death of her son sent her young husband into a depression;
he couldn’t go to work
and often cried by the child’s grave.
He beat Mary to relieve stress.
Today, she still has a large scar on her left arm,
a result of the time her husband cut her arm out of anger.
Two days after the birth of the third child,
a beautiful second baby girl,
her husband grabbed the newborn’s leg
and smashed it against the wall,
causing the baby to have a hearing disorder
and require a hearing aid.
Despite having two children,
one just a few weeks old and the other just two,
Mary decided to take them away from home and never return.
the second child,
was 4 weeks old,
Mary went to work at a discount store to make a living.
After 1 year, she met another man
and quickly got married.
Although the new husband owned a successful construction company,
he was also an abuser and was arrested
and put on trial in Louisiana
for drug addiction.
And yet, her fourth child, Allen, now 26,
was born with unexplained developmental delays
and a seizure disorder.
“Experts” advised her to let the baby live in a charity facility.
At the time of Allen’s birth,
she was 24 years old and already had 2 daughters,
aged 6 and 2.
She has no money,
Most people think it is best for Mary to seek help.
And for a time she did.
When Allen was 15 months old,
she took the baby to a program for children with special needs
But the show wasn’t right for him,”
she said, withdrawing Allen’s name from the program after six months.
She started paying herself to take Allen to therapists,
even karate lessons.
She didn’t stop until Allen could ride a tricycle and then a bicycle.
Today Allen can drive a car.
And finally on April 20, 1990, year 40,
she had the courage to say goodbye to her abusive husband
and follow her heart’s call.
She wanted to share
what she learned about raising children with special needs.
“I call it my independence day,” she said.
I tried to explain to myself the reason
for not leaving my husband by thinking,
“I have two children.
Who would want to love me again?”
And finally one day I said, “I want to love myself.”
What if you are a housewife without a degree?
What if you don’t have a college degree
or a certificate in special education?
What if you don’t have a trust fund
to buy expensive monitors and oxygen devices?
She decided to take what she had
– the will and willingness to see a soul
with much potential behind every child the doctor deemed “hopeless”.
Although life has tested her many times,
she still chooses to give, making a real change in the lives of the 35 children
who participated in the special needs program
at Lee’s Summit in New York. Missouri.
The center is called Giant Step and is run by Mary,
who has overcome the obstacle of deafness
and is working as a nurse, and her son Allen,
who works as a transportation director.
“My business card says I’m the program director,” says Guthrie,
“but I was actually a single mom in 1973.
I believe you can focus on doing anything if you really want to.”
As a special needs information center,
her phone rarely stopped ringing.
She can fluently read the phone numbers of the Spina bifida Foundation,
the Down Syndrome Foundation,
She was the coach of the Special Olympics for 9 years.
“One day, they called me to ask
if I wanted to coach for this year’s Special Olympics again,”
says Mary. I said I’d be happy
if we could practice around 3 to 4.30 a.m.,
which is the only time I’m free
A combination of Erin Brockovich,
George Carlin, and Mother Teresa,
Mary has tried anything to help sick children,
from Down syndrome to autism, seizures
and Prader-Willi disease.
“My idea is just to help people get to know each other.
We all want to be loved and accepted.”
Whether it’s sewing a costume
for a child with Down syndrome
or assisting with a performance
of “Smoke on the Water” for a child who is mute,
she is always looking for new ways to reach children.
She tells them jokes and calls them nicknames,
a refreshing change in the serious world of children in need of special care.
“My motto is:
It doesn’t matter how long you live,
it matters how happy you live,” she said.
Initially, when establishing Giant Step,
Mary’s company only had one member,
Nicholas, a baby who, according to doctors’ diagnosis,
was lucky to live only 3 days.
Now, Nicholas is 7 years old,
going to school and challenging life.
As the list of children grew,
when after Nicholas there were Lauran,
Jacob, Jenner, Tommy and many other children,
Guthrie moved out of the house
where she lived and dedicated the place to serving children.
“If we followed the books,
we wouldn’t have done it,” she said.
It’s amazing that we’re here.
Maybe someone really wants me to do this.”
Giant Steps isn’t the biggest establishment you’ll find
(Mary says, “To my mind,
Abe Lincoln was born in a cabin in the woods.”)
and amidst the bureaucracy and rules of government,
she was always struggling with a problem.
“What happens in your real world doesn’t mean
it will happen in my real world,” she said.
But when you commit to your dream,
all doors mysteriously open.
For example, Mary enjoys being a freelance writer.
While everyone knows it’s “impossible”
to sell scripts for big TV shows,
especially when you’re 40 and live in Nowheresville,
Missouri, she approaches her new goal the way
she approaches everyone with other things in life.
“Most people see the stone wall step.
I also saw a stone wall but immediately looked to see
where I could pole-jump to get over it.
The money she made from selling scripts
for TV series such as Roseanne,
In Living Color and Murphy Brown was used to fund Giant Step.
Writing the screenplay for Roseanne was purely coincidental.
In fact, it all started with defiance.
Her daughter came to visit
and while watching an episode of the popular sitcom,
Mary began to say a few words about the ending.
A comedian and joke teller by nature,
Mary says: “I could have come up with a better line than that.
Movies can create more laughter.”
The daughter said to her,
“All right, big boss.
If you think you’re funny,
why don’t you try writing an episode script?”
That night she sat down
to write (she didn’t even have a typewriter or proper script format
– what was that?)
and started writing an episode.
14 hours later, she finished writing.
“Do I think I will be a screenwriter?
I’ve always been the comedian,
the center of parent-teacher conferences,
but I’ve never considered writing a profession.
In fact, my famous story is 10,000 words long
that a Catholic nun asked me
to write over the weekend in high school.
The theme was:
“How can I be a better Catholic”
and that was punishment for something I did.”
For that exercise,
she asked her brother
to take 10 pictures of herself in the various gates
and pews of the church
and taped them with the title:
“A picture is worth a thousand words.”
She eventually learned about the proper scripting format
and succeeded in selling scripts for every show she wanted.
“But my heart was,
is and will always be with the children,” she explained.
Even when she had a minor stroke
and was hospitalized,
wondering where the reconciliation with mothers was,
she checked with Mickey to make sure Lauren,
one of the children with Down’s,
had coins in socks to do the “weight training” exercise.
Nothing can stop Mary Guthrie.
She overcame ovarian cancer in 1991.
She is currently battling lung problems
from inhaling mold too much
from her rehabilitation projects.
“People often ask me,
‘How do you do that?
How did you learn about those disabilities?’
And I answered them: ‘
You learn in turn.
You learn to love each child.
You try each method.”
Today, at 50, Guthrie is probably the happiest
and most capable person I’ve ever known.
She doesn’t make much money.
In fact, she’s pretty proud of the fact
that she can live on less than $20,000 a year.
She understands that life is not about what you get,
but how much you can give.
Instead of lamenting her fate in life,
grumbling about the loss of her child,
she took what she had
– a great heart,
a sense of humor
and a lot of experience working
with children in need her special needs
– and make her life extraordinary.
Mary Guthrie knows who she is.
She knew she had great things to do,
that her life made a difference.
And she found that out by giving so much.
People who live the life they want. — James Twyman
Sing and pray for peace in the world
This is the moment we’ve all been waiting for. We are ready. —James Twyman
Growing up as a devout Irish Catholic,
James Twyman has always felt a deep relationship with God.
He persuaded the priest to let him celebrate
when he was old enough.
He joined the Franciscan priesthood
as soon as he graduated from high school.
But after 2 years,
he became disillusioned
and decided to return to the mundane life.
He went to college,
had a daughter,
and sold handmade beds.
Like many others in the mundane life,
Twyman felt discontent.
The marriage broke up.
He experienced 5, 6 years of mental breakdown.
Finally he reached St. Catherine’s Catholic Worker in southern Chiago,
home to the homeless and AIDS patients.
There, while working with those in need,
he said, “I finally stopped thinking about myself.”
It was the turning point in his life,
the change in perspective
that made his life great.
When he was a kid, he wanted to be a rock singer.
When he was 12 years old, he learned to play the guitar,
honed his skills in playing music, and sang for family and friends.
While working at St. Catherine’s, someone happened
to give him a collection of prayers
from the 12 major religions.
“I find that all religions have the same purpose,” he said.
The common theme is mindfulness.”
Almost as soon as the prayer began,
music began to flow through Twyman’s head.
Instead of rejecting the whispering voice within,
he sat down and wrote guitar music for each peace prayer.
From that moment on,
Twyman knew exactly what he wanted to do.
He will become a peaceful troubadour.
He will sing his songs of peace
to those who are willing to listen.
He will share his music in places of violence.
He will hold a prayer for peace.
Britain will plant peace posts in conflict zones.
“Music has a power of its own that cannot be found anywhere else,” he said.
I feel like people can hear music
and prayers they don’t hear from politicians
– it’s time to return to peace.
I decided to go to the places that needed peace the most.”
But… but… who allowed him to do that?
What organization does he work for?
When you find your passion the last thing you need is permission.
And if no other organization is doing what you feel you need to do,
you create your own.
In February 1998,
when he was interviewed on a British radio station
and did not think anyone would take his idea seriously,
he made a silly comment that he wanted
to sing an Islamic peace prayer
for Saddam Hussein.
At that time, war with Iraq was imminent.
A British ambassador to Iraq overheard the interview
and within two days Twyman was on a plane to Tehran.
He held a concert for peace that was broadcast nationwide
and emailed everyone to send his feelings of peace while he performed.
Millions of people around the world have responded.
Three days later, the peace treaty was signed.
The following week,
James was invited to Northern Ireland
where peace talks in Belfast were stalled.
Once again he sang
and again he sent an email asking people to pray
to focus on Northern Ireland.
Three days later, a major breakthrough occurred in the negotiations,
allowing a peace treaty to be signed a month earlier than scheduled.
On November 13, 1998, nine months
after the Iraqui Peace Concert,
the press reported that negotiations
with Hussien had been broken down.
America prepares to attack at any moment.
James, along with several other great writers and thinkers,
organized an Internet prayer campaign.
“We didn’t know that the day we held our vigil
around the world was
also the day President Clinton ordered the attack,” he said.
The plane was already in the air waiting
for orders to drop bombs.
Within hours of the night of prayer,
Clinton ordered an unprecedented retreat,
calling the plane back not once but twice.
As far as I know,
this has never happened with the attack command.”
While there is no definite scientific method
to study the relationship
between millions of world peace prayers
and the signing of peace treaties,
there must be some connection.
In 2000, Yassir Arafat commented
that it would take a million prayers for peace
to come to the Middle East.
So Twyman did what any peace troubadour would do.
He ran a huge campaign on the Internet
to collect a million prayers.
And when he gathered enough
he began to move to the Middle East
and give it to Arafat himself.
Just one person?
Make a huge difference.
According to Twyman,
the message of peace can be shortened to a simple question:
Are you ready?
Yes I’m ready.
People who live the life they want. – Susan Krabacher
From Playboy Mansion to Haitian slums
You can’t stop their tears for 1 second just by stepping closer,
you can not do it. —Susan Krabacher
On the surface, Susan Krabacher leads a glamorous life.
Blonde, pretty, married to a wealthy Aspen businessman,
she has everything most of us could wish for.
She modeled for 16 years,
appeared on the cover of Playboy magazine,
lived in the same affluent area as Kevin Costner.
But in October 1994, while contemplating
whether to open a second antique shop,
she was shown a television program
about poverty in Mongolia.
She said to her husband,
“God, I want to do something to help these people.”
She writes to several charities,
and although they are happy
to accept her money,
none of them want her to help “hands-on”.
They said she was ineligible and untrained.
She replied, “Okay, then I’ll do it myself.”
a friend who works
as a management consultant in the church she frequents,
suggested that she go with him to Haiti.
“This country is 10 times poorer
and is on the same hemisphere as us,” he said.
Within a month, Susan was on the plane.
Within a week of going to Haiti,
she thought about not returning home.
And in just 7 years, her Global Charity
and Sharing Fund has funded 5 orphanages,
6 schools and 2 medical clinics,
helping about 1,600 children each year.
“I can’t imagine living without them,” she said.
And although Susan has returned
to her residency in Aspen,
she spends four to six months each year in Haiti,
singing to babies,
some of whom die in her arms
– cuddling children who are bedridden
from illness disabled and brought food
to hundreds of children
whose main food came from nearby trash cans.
In turn, she suffered from head lice,
She has to fight gangs that steal her device
and put a gun to her head,
she has to fight hurricanes,
and she defies government officials
who only want bribes to allow her to care for her baby.
“They wanted $300 per child,” she said.
That’s more than double the two-year salary in Haiti.
I told them,
“Okay, I’ll take the kids home tomorrow morning.”
And I never saw them say anything again.
Dusseau was right about poverty.
Haiti is known as the poorest country in the Western Hemisphere.
70% of the population is unemployed.
The lucky few have jobs that earn an average of only $150 per year.
The housing is so small that family members have to take turns sleeping.
On her first trip, Susan,
who was used to the happy life of Aspen,
insisted on spending the night at Cite Soleil,
a slum of more than 4,000 square meters,
where a million people live.
She shares her shack with 17 Haitians.
“The next day I didn’t dare hug her
because she smelled so bad.”
Ever since living at Hugh Hefner’s mansion in Los Angeles,
Susan has always given poor children special affection
because of her difficult childhood.
At the age of 8, she was abused by her grandfather
and sent to a child care center at the age of 12,
she understood what poverty was.
Although she was allowed back to live
with her family at the age of 14,
she was turned away again at the age of 17
after a photographer sent a picture
of her in a bikini to the Playboy mogul.
Claiming to be older than her actual age,
Susan was transported in a limousine from her hometown of Utah
to her Los Angeles mansion.
“I hid there for three days,” she said.
I was very scared,
worried that I would see orgies.”
She eventually befriended other models
and joined the nightly circus at Hef’s house,
where she continued to live for about a year.
Despite all the fun, money,
(she was the center of Playboy magazine in 1983),
Susan has low self-esteem
and suffers from anorexia.
In 1984, a brief marriage brought her to Aspen,
where she met Joe,
her current husband, the lawyer
who handled her divorce.
Although her marriage to Joe was very happy
and she enjoyed the antiques business,
she didn’t really find her true mission
until she went to Haiti
and saw 100 tiny cradles
with babies was dying in the abandoned children’s center
at the government hospital Port-au-Prince.
The friend who invited her to Haiti said:
“I think she’s going to get there,
write a check,
pick up a few kids and hit the road.
I don’t think she wants to stay.”
Susan said: “I don’t want my tombstone to say:
‘She was Miss May 1983’
Ways to be great
We make a life on what we get;
we create life
with what we give. —Winston Churchill
The world is full of problems
so finding your own niche can be a daunting task.
I mean, how can I alone solve world hunger?
How can a single mother like me deal
with the AIDS epidemic?
It’s true I can’t.
But I can bake cookies for a starving homeless child.
And I can give a back massage to the neighborhood artist who has AIDS.
And every time I give a little,
the world becomes a little sweeter,
a little closer to heaven.
Not all of us are Jonas Salk.
But we would make a big mistake
if we believe that our contribution and giving,
no matter how small,
is not important. 365 days a year,
rain or snow,
Diane Heinen wakes up,
drives to a gas station on the main road in her hometown,
Kansas (with a population of about 1,200).
She used white shoe polish to write “Happy Birthday” in capital letters
to those who had birthdays that day.
She has a list of the birthdays of every resident in town
and she even remembers the birthdays of people
who used to live in Valley Falls
– even though they now live in Timbuktu.
Small thing? It’s not small
if you ask the people of Valley Falls,
who have a great sense of community.
Last year’s Valentine’s Day,
my friend Kitty was unemployed.
The next day, she had to pay the mortgage.
She didn’t know how to pay for food for her two dogs,
Grace and Maggie,
let alone pay the $1,000 mortgage.
According to “they say” it would be wise
to spend all day sending out resumes looking for work.
But Kitty decided to defy “they say”.
She spent the last $15 on Valentine’s cards
and toys for the children’s party.
In the recipient section she wrote “To my friend”
and signed below “From your friend”.
She tied red ribbons around Maggie and Grace’s necks,
put them on her Meazda Miata,
and drove out.
She sends Valentine’s cards along with a small bracelet
or a plastic toy plane to 40 children,
most of whom are hospitalized with pacemakers.
She would walk into the hospital room and say,
“I’ve been looking for you all day.”
At first, the parents looked at each other in shock.
“Who is this strange person?”
But the kids know.
According to Kitty, it was the best Valentine’s Day she’s ever had.
Yes, according to them,
she should lament her lack of boyfriend or job.
But thanks to her sense of humor and love,
she is remembered as a great person.
Service to humanity can take many forms,
but it always includes the act of spreading love,
and making children smile.
Above all, it’s the only thing that will make you happy.
3 big questions
Compared to what we should be,
we are only happy soon in our fire fire is damp,
our buff is person.
We are using a small part of our mental and physical resources. —William James
In a recent poll, 21% of North Americans said they often feel depressed.
You feel the same way,
so what’s the big deal?
But as Helen Keller once said,
“No pessimist has ever discovered the secrets of the stars
or sailed to new lands
or opened new horizons to the human soul.”
“How can I open up new horizons for the human soul?”
with the following questions:
1.What is the meaning of my life?
2.How would I live if I was the only one in the world?
3. What do I do better than others?
How can I share that with others?
Soul training camp
If we do what we can,
we will surprise ourselves. —Thomas Edison
Exercise: For the next 7 days,
do what constructive living people call a “secret mission.”
We look everywhere—advertisements,
or on the psychiatrist’s couch
—and we still wonder what the meaning of life is.
After 20 years of searching we
still don’t know our purpose.
We thought it could be a successful career,
a penthouse overlooking the seaport, but God,
when we finally get there, the hole is still there,
still asking to be filled.
Finding out who you really are
and why you’re here includes helping others.
No other way.
Helping can take many different forms,
but always includes spreading love,
and making children smile.
For the next 7 days,
try out the secret mission,
a popular exercise for people
who do Constructive Living,
this is how to see the world in action
and avoid the tendency to over-analyze our circumstances and feelings,
but only to act.
Secret missions, big or small,
must be carried out
without the knowledge of others.
You can mow the lawn for your neighbors
when they go to work.
Or leave cookies on someone’s doorstep.
Remember that no one should know you are the doer.
This takes away our need to score points
or look good in the eyes of others.
and without fuss is a natural inclination of the soul,
a natural inclination that many of us inadvertently forget.
And while we can help others,
the main reason we help our brothers and sisters is
because it reminds us of a larger reality,
it helps us identify the reality
that we bigger than your neurosis,
or as you learn to help and give,
you quickly realize that you are more than just a number,
not just a speck of dust in a big,
Even when the drug addict is put in prison,
even when the elderly woman is dead,
even when Trevor gives up on his plan,
Trevor’s act of kindness bears fruit.
This child started a movement through
which people love each other,
protect and care for each other.
This chain of kindness
and generosity goes on endlessly
and never ends.
Kindness is so simple yet so profound.
Somebody Loves You, Mr. Hatch,
one of my daughter’s favorite books,
is about a lonely man who used to get up at 6:30 a.m.
to walk the next eight blocks and shoelace factory,
where he worked. At lunchtime,
he sat alone in a corner,
drinking coffee and chewing cheese
and a mustard sandwich.
After work, he stopped by the store
to buy paper and fresh turkey wings.
After dinner, he read the newspaper
and went to bed early so he could wake up early
and everything would start again.
On a Saturday, the postman brought him a parcel,
which was a box of candy with a small white card.
Inside the card was written:
“Someone loves you.”
Mr. Hatch was shocked.
As he dusted the house,
he checked the candy box over
and over to see if the card was still there.
Who really loves me?
Who could that be?
Finally he put on a yellow tie with blue polka dots,
sprayed on perfume,
and went for a walk outside.
He waved to everyone,
a change that made the neighbors “fall back”.
At work the following Monday,
he went to the canteen and shared his box of chocolates.
After work, he offered to look after the newsstand
so the owner could see the doctor by appointment.
Instead of reading the newspaper after dinner,
he bakes cakes and shares them with the neighbors.
He even dusted his harmonica and played a few tunes he knew as a kid.
This cheerful atmosphere continued for weeks
until the postman returned to his house with a shy look.
“Ah, do you remember the parcel
I brought on Valentine’s Day?”
“Yes,” replied Mr. Hatch hesitantly.
“I’m afraid I’ve delivered the wrong address,
and if I don’t, my boss will fire me.” stammering postman.
Mr. Hatch returned the box to the postman
even though the candy had already been eaten
by Mr. Hatch’s new friends.
Suddenly he realized:
“It turns out that no one secretly loves me.”
He went back to his old t-shirt,
his habit of eating cheese
and mustard sandwiches alone in the corner.
He forgot to talk to the butcher
and the newspaperman.
People began to wonder,
“What happened to Mr. Hatch?”
The postman told the story
and everyone showed up
in front of his house one morning
with a big sign that read:
“Everybody loves you, Mr. Hatch.”
He cried with joy and stepped down to join his friends.
A small act of love can make a difference in Mr. Hatch’s life.
A tiny box of chocolates
and a few words card. Someone loves him.
Outside there are thousands of people like Mr. Hatch
and they are waiting for these little words.
The people of northern Russia know the phrase “soul dialogue.”
It means speaking from the heart, talking about HUGE things.
Grandparents sit under an old oak tree with their grandchildren and say,
“Let’s talk about great ideas.
Let’s talk about our souls, about what matters.”
These conversations can last for hours.
In the United States there is not even a phrase for “soul dialogue.”
Parents are too busy
with the daily rhythm of life to have time to sit down
and talk to their children and say,
“You know, I believe in this.
I come from here.
This is what you used to do
when you were your age.
She hopes this for you.”
According to an article in the New York Times,
the average parent spends about 10 minutes a day talking
to their child.
Even stay-at-home mothers spend less
than 15 minutes talking to their children.
Regardless of the time you ask questions like,
“Did you clean your room?”
and “Did you do your math homework?”
there is less than a minute left for a brief kiss or to say,
“I love you. And what does that mean?
“I love you.”
Do we sit down next to our children
and tell them about love?
Or do we let them make their own assumptions
from the messages they get on television,
from the movies where handsome men look into the eyes
of beauty queens lovingly
and instantly find love.
Instead of just saying it in words,
maybe we should sit down and tell our children what love is.
Love is when the beauty queen gives birth to a boy
and the boy is there at that moment to hold her hand.
Or when he comes home late but she decides to trust him anyway.
We need to spend more time talking about things like love.
About great ideas.
About big dreams.
Not: “How did you do on the spelling test?”
or “Where is the TV remote hidden?”
It should be conversations about inner hopes,
God, your body, your daughter,
or your favorite jelly.
Children need many hours of conversations with people
who are willing to set an example for them to follow.
They desperately need to look into that mirror’s untouched soul.
Your child needs to talk to you, to hear what you think,
and to know who you are.
Do they need to know what you accept?
They need to hear
from you that a great idea is much more important
than a big beautiful car,
that a big dream is much more important than a leather jacket.
Perhaps that’s why H. Jackson Brown’s Life’s Little Instruction Book
is so successful.
The book was originally just a small gift
for his son to go to college and included 511 reminders
on how to live a happy
and rewarding life,
but later it was published and sold millions of copies.
Basically, Brown is having a “soul dialogue” with his son.
“I respect you so I want to share with you what I think,” he said.
When he advised his son
to “assess the neighborhood by the kindness of the people
who live there, not the property value,”
“singing in the shower,”
“do not be miserly
when using running tools.” electricity,”
“reading Leadership is the Art by Max Depree,” he never said:
“This is what I know and believe.”
Our children need this kind of soul dialogue.
Those who have seen Bull Durham
will surely remember Kevin Costner’s speech
to Susan Sarandon, a four-minute prayer about believing in “the soul,
the waist, the tee shot in baseball,
food fiber, good Scotch,
that Susan Sontag’s novels are selfless and mediocre.”
He continued, “I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone.
I believe that the Constitution should be amended to prohibit artificial peat.
I believe in voting,
in chocolate chip cookies,
and in opening presents on Christmas Day,
not Christmas Eve.”
All Sarandon’s character Annie Savoy could say was,
“Oh my god!” It is a spiritual dialogue.
Marry, my former roommate,
and I used to have “souls” conversations for hours on end.
Many nights we started at 10 p.m.
and talked about everything from politician Walter Mondale,
pollution in the Kansas River,
to whether her blue shirt would match my patterned dress.
We would prolong this spiritual dialogue our thoughts,
more accurately—through 2 or 3 a.m.,
until one of us resolved to say,
“I think we should go to sleep. stop.
Otherwise we won’t be able to get up and go to work tomorrow.”
These conversations energize us.
They expand our souls.
They stir our hearts.
They make us greater people.
We need to talk about important things.
It’s easy to forget what’s important in this culture of cable television
and automatic garage doors.
It’s easy to forget to wave to our neighbors,
let alone talk from the soul.
We no longer sit in our front yard
and shout “Hello” to our neighbors.
We no longer trust our leaders,
or decide to trust others.
What’s worse is
that we don’t even realize the sadness of the things we’ve lost.
People who live the life they want. – Julie And Bruce Madsen
Give up everything to spread the good news
I started to question:
will we do it like this with our marriage,
resetting the roof,
bringing the Gara assistance,
or recognizing the house? – Julie Madsen
Bruce and Julie Madsen once lived the American dream:
they had a luxurious five-bedroom house in Shaker Heights,
a wealthy suburb in Cleveland,
money to do almost anything they wanted.
But one day, after 10 hours of work at her private center,
Julie lay flat on her bed and said to her husband, “Is that all?”
Both work long hours.
Julie is at her success consulting center,
and Bruce has been a manager at General Electric for the past 26 years.
It seems their promising two-year marriage is starting to get boring.
They barely had time to have dinner together,
let alone discuss the important issues
that brought them together in the first place.
Along with that boredom comes the nightly news.
and indifference are not the only thing happening in America,
“It suddenly became clear to me
that I no longer wanted to sit within four walls
and do nothing but listen
to Dan Rather bring bad news,” Julie said.
At that moment,
the duo hatched a plan.
They would quit their jobs,
buy an RV,
and travel the country in search of stories
that the nightly news had missed.
A story of hope, faith and courage.
The Story of the American Dream.
“A lot of my clients are depressed.
And how can they not be depressed
when they have to listen to the desperate news from television
and newspapers all day?”
“We decided to let people know that there’s
still a lot of great things going on and that America is
still a good country,” Julie said.
In just four months,
they bought a Sunnybrook pickup and trailer.
They quit their jobs for $120,000 a year.
They put their suburban house for sale.
They also sell fine ceramics,
antique furniture and their oriental tapestries.
“We never made a living writing before,
but so what?
We decided to become journalists.”
In April 1995,
the time that terrorists blew up the federal building in Oklahoma City,
the two began their strange mission.
The bomb explosion that killed 129 people made them
even more determined build hope and find good things.
They call themselves bounty hunters,
the bounty here being “happiness.”
They quickly acquired a weekly column in several newspapers in Ohio.
They persuaded the RV lending department at Chase Manhattan Bank
to launch a website about their American adventure.
So what if gippi journalists only make $1,100 a month,
which is 90% off their original salary?
They are following their hearts,
thinking bigger than the upper-class lifestyle they work
so hard to make ends meet.
Their first stop was the RV park in Maggie Valley,
They invited everyone there to eat with them.
They say, “Bring a dish and a touching story.”
Great success has come. A month later,
USA Today became aware of their unusual assignment
and printed their email addresses with each article;
The stories started pouring in.
For the next three years,
the couple lived in a 76-square-foot mobile home
with only a few laptops, a modem,
a mobile phone and a printer,
but they became “collectors” good things”.
They traveled to all 50 states across the United States,
for their new columns
and eventually writing a book of 59 stories of hope.
Just as they thought, the two found great news
and stories of good people everywhere
– a priest filling a swamp
to build a soccer field for children,
a disabled man riding a hot air balloon,
a woman Plays the piano in the sanatorium,
a painter makes crosses for unnamed graves.
They don’t even have to search hard.
“Stories ‘self’ find us,” says Bruce.
We see them lining up at the post office or the laundromat.”
“We call these stories coins from heaven,” says Julie.
They rebuild our faith in America and our zest for life.
I think if I hadn’t made that trip,
I might have lost most of my ability to love.”
Today, the Madsens live in San Francisco,
write books, and prove once again that
if you dare to step out of your shell
and commit to living the life you want,
the world will be better off,
will “nod in agreement” and support you.
People who live the life they want. -Andrea Campbell
Say “Yes” to every possibility
To create the life you want,
you have to pursue it.
You create your own universe.
Whatever step you must take to create your universe,
you must let go of your previous timidity
and fear in order to move on.
Don’t let shame keep you
from pursuing what you want.
That will only set you up for failure.
The worst that can happen is you get rejected
by someone else – so what?
You still have other borders and other territories to conquer.
Always remember that.
That is the most important thing. — Georgette Mosbacher
Andrea Campbell pasted the above statements
in front of her computer.
So far it has been very effective.
If she let shame weigh on her ability to pursue what she wants,
she would never have become a flight attendant,
tea house singer,
life exchange advocate with member,
forensic scientist and now successful writer.
“I follow my passion wherever it leads me,”
says the 52-year-old mother of two grown sons.
She thinks big in all circumstances.
And she can do this because, according to her,
“she knows how to get over herself.”
Everything happened during her second facial reconstruction surgery.
Not only did she have a very rare Pindborg tumor,
which destroyed 40% of her jaw,
but the doctor also had to remove part of her hip bone to rebuild her jaw,
so she had to learn how to walk again.
She mastered the steps twice
– as a baby and when she was 22 after breaking her ankle
at flight attendant school.
She said: “I was riding my bike when it overturned.
I look down at my feet and the soles of my shoes look at me.”
She had to wear a bandage for 6 months and due to the pain,
she was forced to use and become addicted to morphine.
After the bandages were removed,
she had to not only practice movement,
but also learn to walk and detox from morphine.
So she was missing part of her hip bone
and would have to do it again.
Only this time, due to the lack of jawbone,
her face was deformed,
not to mention that she
and her husband had to re-mortgage the house
to pay for the surgery costs.
Needless to say, she was devastated.
She said: “When you are injured,
you look at other healthy people and get a little jealous:
She was sitting in the waiting room for surgery in Dallas
when the “oh” moment happened.
The doctor here specializes in surgery
for children with birth defects,
subject to lifelong disfigurement.
Sitting next to her were 20 Russian children
with major deformities.
“One girl had only one eye on her forehead,
another boy had four nostrils,
and all of a sudden I thought:
What was my problem?
I no longer feel sorry for myself.”
It was really a big turning point.
She realizes that outwardly,
power and sex,
which most of us value in today’s culture,
And she spent the rest of her life proving it.
One of the things she does is dedicate her heart
and soul to writing.
Her books (the seventh book coming out this spring)
cover a wide variety of topics
from great party games, self-help through journalism,
and the criminal justice system. the.
While writing for a children’s career magazine,
she discovered her main passion.
While interviewing M. J. Willard,
a primate researcher
who founded a nonprofit called Helping Hands,
she became interested in the monk monkeys
that a group was training
to support those quadriplegic person.
Similar to the program helping the blind,
Helping Hands trains monkeys to comb their hair,
play video tapes and microwave food.
According to Andrea,
the most important thing is that they know how to hug.
In just eight months,
Andrea became the adoptive mother of Ziggy,
a monk monkey born on Discovery Island
She said of Ziggy,
the monkey that came to her
when she was 5 weeks old,
smaller than the palm of her hand:
“Jane Goodall went to Africa to study primates.
I study a primate right in my hand.
Primates are very special.
I know this sounds weird,
but they really change your life.
They make you a better person.”
First of all, they don’t care how you look
or how much money you have.
In fact, if you want to have a role model
for the life you want,
“Monkeys are so adorable,
there are no preconceptions or conditions.
A monkey loves you because it loves you.
People are different, they become uncomfortable,
uncomfortable around people with quadriplegia.
That’s not Andrea.
She became a passionate advocate for people with quadriplegia.
She spent four years traveling across the country
and talking about their plight
and how monkeys like Ziggy could help them.
“Can you imagine a day
without being able to feed yourself,
brush your teeth,
walk on your own and not be hugged?
A life with more promise suddenly exists with different rules.
I call quadriplegics silent
and deeply traumatized.”
Andrea says no one knows how their gentle words
and high ideals will manifest themselves.
“All I know is that the world is a wonderful place.
And the more you use it to renew yourself,
the more beautiful your life will become.”
Are you kidding?
I don’t have time to “bless much.”
I’m trying to get the laundry done.
That’s the interesting thing about Blessing.
You don’t have to go anywhere
or sign up for something new.
You don’t have to volunteer.
Or take more time.
All you need is to open your heart to the people around you.
People who show up every day in your life.
Some of you already know.
Others you will meet tomorrow.
But remember this.
Blessing the people in your life is
as simple as cursing them or worse,
“To the world,
you may be just one person…
but to one person…
you are the world.
When Aimee Bentlage worked
as a training officer at Drake Law School,
she remembered every student’s name
and face so much that
when they stopped by the office,
she could greet them by name.
One small thing?
Not at all,
especially for a law student.
Aimee is now a financial planner,
and instead of looking for clients
who want to save a lot of money,
she looks for clients
who want to use their money for good.
And not only that,
but she also comes up
with many interesting
and unusual ways
in which customers can use their money.
One of them is to take every teacher,
from kindergarten to high school,
to dinner at a nice restaurant.
Minas Demetrious owns an antique store at 43,
Ninth Avenue in Manhattan.
He sells everything from Italian zebra-patterned tiles
to Austrian crystal salt.
However, the real reason people visit this antique shop is
because they love Minas’ great spirit and warm heart.
With a Greek accent,
he greets everyone,
knows each customer by name,
and if you visit his one-of-a-kind store,
you’ll soon be no longer a stranger.
I have 7 chairs that are not for sale.
They’re for the 89-year-old retired shoemaker
who still comes here every day,
they’re for the homeless woman
who still visits him at least once a day.
Thrift and New Shoppe,
is a meeting place for writers,
and sword swallowers.
They are people from all walks of life,
with all different ethnicities.
And Minas takes the time
to make people feel like family.
Every Tuesday, “patrons” bring their entire family
to the store to meet their friends.
“It’s nice to be a good person,” Minas said.
Another thing we can do is look into our own hearts
to see where we are still not doing well.
Instead of getting angry and thinking,
“Why would they do that?”
When we see headlines about policemen beating innocent people
or employees bringing guns to work,
we can look at the unhealed wounds in our own hearts.
When we feel angry,
we want revenge because someone broke up with us or said,
“You’re not the one I’m looking for.
” Instead of giving in and wondering,
“Why would anyone do this?” We must ask,
“Why can I do these things?”
How can I punish myself for eating an entire box of waffles?
Or blame yourself for not being more social,
not jogging today or not
(fill in the blanks yourself)?
When do I feel hurt by my own violence?
This is a question we can ask ourselves.
And when we ask questions,
we can keep helping strangers carry their bags,
keep buying 29-cent cards
for kids in the emergency room,
or keep delivering our lunches to those in need
elderly people living in nursing homes.
3 big questions
Either way, progress in life comes from adaptation,
not blind lust. — Henry Miller
The average square footage of a newly built home in the US has increased
by 33% over the past 13 years.
Do we need such a big house?
Maybe we should strive to have a 33% greater heart.
Other magic questions include:
1.What can I do to make my family’s life brighter?
2. If I only had one day left to live, what would I do?
3. What wish could I make for others today?
Soul training camp
Have a good chat How to overcome the syndrome “Fear of people”
My goal is to say or do at least one bold thing each week. —Maggie Kuhn
For the next 7 days talk to at least 3 strangers every day.
This week you will be in contact with people
who come within 1 meter of you.
You can laugh, wink or ask them
which character they like best from the comedy The Three Stooges.
You have to talk to at least 3 new people every day
and wave to every car you see.
Anyway, do it.
If necessary, remind yourself that the root word for silly is sillig,
which means “happy.”
And the “silliest” thing is that 3 simple acts of connection have the power
to solve depression,
and end world hunger.
Most adults in the United States are very lonely and isolated.
Your bright smile and polls may be the only conversation
they have for the day.
Leo Buscaglia tells the story of an evening
with friends at a bar in San Francisco:
The conversation was very lively.
We share our reactions to the entertainment of a strange day.
I see the man at the next table sitting alone,
staring at his half-empty cocktail. I said,
“Why don’t we invite him to join us?
He looks lonely.
I know how lonely it feels to be in a crowded room.”
“Leave him alone” all the others agreed