Chapter 3: How to solve the mystery in the relationship?
People do everything they need to have a righteous name,
have an argument to present,
find a way to explain as if there is a reason,
everything will go smoothly.
Some people are so superstitious about reasons,
they don’t even need to know anything else.
The so-called use of excuses is actually
just not making sense to look for reasons,
so when we go to use excuses,
we must appear to have enough reason
to have a chance
to boast if not only make people suspicious and wary.
1. Even if you talk nonsense,
there must be a way to say it
Humans are rational animals,
big and small things must have a name,
a way of calling,
a way of saying it.
Even a scoundrel won’t let others curse unreasonably,
they have their own reasons,
even if they are not.
The emperor killed the mandarin,
except for those who opposed it,
he also needed to explain to the mandarin,
although he wanted to arrest him,
he could say whatever he wanted.
In daily life, many times we also have to find a way to hide.
The trick is always needed,
just good or bad staging.
There is a very interesting story,
an Indian thief was caught red-handed.
Unexpectedly, the thief was not afraid, but swaggered, saying,
“If I take this thing and run away,
But unfortunately I only took this thing,
at best I will return it.
With you, that’s fine, after saying that,
he politely clasped his hands behind his back and left.
there was a friend who came to India for the first time
to travel and had an argument with other people.
When he entered the hotel to eat dinner,
he left his seat a few times,
once returned to his seat,
he saw a young man hooking his wallet in the pocket
of his coat hanging on the chair,
he scolded the thief, the thief was calm.
However, he said he was cleaning the wallet,
but did not admit that he was stealing.
It seems that Indian thieves are masters
who make up excuses to escape.
If according to us,
that thief has no words to be able to defend,
but they can calmly give a certain logical statement,
it is not simple.
In this case, the opponent is very calm
and quick-witted despite the extremely dangerous situation.
That’s because once people admit their mistakes,
it is very likely that they will never get up
and be led away by the other side.
Of course, it’s not to encourage people not to admit their flaws,
to incite acts of changing white for black,
here just to emphasize that there are some people
who have just met for the first time
and have opened their mouths
to say all sorts of nonsense.
It will only make them untenable, but not helpful.
If you don’t see far and wide, using random excuses,
you can only face a lot of trouble
or even lose your life.
Using this trick to do evil things can’t have good results.
2. The main name is the right language advertisers are connoisseurs of tricks.
when starting to advertise instant coffee in the United States,
a story happened as follows.
This coffee company predicted
that the simple
and convenient instant coffee would be welcomed by housewives,
the sales did not do well.
It’s not a matter of taste,
but because the impression of coffee
at that time in America was roasting and blending in the family,
so people don’t like to talk about simplicity and convenience.
The company changed the way of advertising,
emphasizing the time-saving feature
to let housewives take care of their husbands and children.
Changing the way of advertising like
that makes housewives feel secure
because using instant coffee does not bring fear of hardship,
but rather to have more time
to take care of their husband and children.
Since changing the way of advertising,
the amount of instant coffee sold each year has increased.
Everything has two sides.
To say traditional is to imply antiquated.
If only emphasizing the simple and convenient instant coffee,
people think that it is stealing the process,
fearing the difficulty, but if it is changed to save time, it is accepted.
People are like that,
everything needs to be done with a righteous name,
given a certain guise,
people are happy to deceive themselves and do it,
especially when it benefits them.
In fact, alcoholics all say that they do not actively ask for alcohol,
but use the guise of respecting people to drink.
It seems that it is a typical Chinese mentality that when doing something, they always find a reason to refuse responsibility, even though they know they are responsible, they will definitely refuse. Taking advantage of this kind of mentality, we must first prepare an excuse for the other party to lose control.
For example, when giving a gift, say:
“You help me so much,
I don’t know how to appreciate it.”
This is a little bit of my sincerity,
please accept it.
The party is willing to accept the gift
without fear of being seen as corrupt
and taking bribes.
3. Seven Types of Reasons to Give Gifts
Gift giving is an indispensable act in human-to-human communication.
The right gift-giving method makes people happy,
the atmosphere is comfortable.
If the way to give is not good,
people will return it,
it will definitely be uncomfortable in the heart for many days.
Therefore, it is necessary to master the gift-giving technique
to be able to successfully complete the gift-giving process.
The most headache in gift giving is nothing compared
to the other party do not want
to accept or refuse strictly,
or refuse skillfully,
and send back all make the gift giver extremely sad,
it is very tragic.
So how to make every gift-giving successful?
The key is to find the right excuse,
how to speak when giving gifts skillfully,
There are several measures below:
1. Borrow flowers to offer to Buddha
If we give a special gift,
it must be said that the family member just sent it
and wants to share a little bit
for the other party to enjoy,
the gift is not much
and it doesn’t cost money to buy,
please accept it.
In general, the recipient of the gift finds our attitude sincere,
so there is no way to refuse to accept the gift.
2. Pretend to give gifts back
If we give a type of wine,
then using the excuse that someone else gave us
a few bottles of good wine,
now bring a bottle to ask the other party
to prepare a snack.
So, if you drink one bottle and get one,
your close relationship won’t be revealed,
isn’t it wonderful?
3. Borrow a horse to hunt birds
Sometimes we want to give someone a gift
but the other person is too strange to have a relationship,
we have to choose the birthday
or wedding date of the other person
and invite some friends to come
and give congratulatory gifts,
the recipient of the gift could not refuse.
When we know that it is our intention,
of course the other party will change their view of you.
Borrowing the power of many people
to give gifts to impress is the best way.
4. Di flower next to carpentry
Mr. Truong wants to ask Mr. Luu to help him
with something, intends to give him a gift,
but is afraid that he will refuse to lose face.
Mr. Truong’s wife was very close to Mr. Luu’s lover,
Mr. Truong used his wife’s diplomacy
to ask his wife to bring gifts to visit that girl,
so it would definitely be successful.
It seems that a direct attack is not as good as a indirect attack.
5. Say borrow first, pay later
For example, we give a little money
to a family in difficulty,
sometimes their self-esteem is very high,
it is not easy to accept help.
If you give an item,
it can be said that this item has not been used,
now you need it,
so you should bring it to you to use first,
later you can buy it back.
If you give money,
it can be said that you can spend it first
and pay it back later.
The person receiving the gift feels
that I am not giving it,
and will pay it back later,
so please accept it.
6. Borrow an egg-laying umbrella
A student who received a lot of favors
from the teacher
but could not find the opportunity
to repay him.
he discovered in the teacher’s picture frame a calligraphy stamp
that did not match the home decor.
Fortunately, his uncle was a calligrapher
with more or less reputation in the country,
He had a copy of his calligraphy in his hand,
and he immediately placed it in the teacher’s glass frame.
The teacher not only did not object,
but was also very interested.
The student has achieved the purpose of gratitude.
7. Borrow the bridging road
Sometimes giving gifts does not necessarily have to spend money
to buy and then pack large and small packages to give away,
but in some cases,
human love is also a kind of gift.
when we adopt a relationship,
we can buy a certain product at the factory price,
a preferential price for our friend.
When they received the goods,
they also cheated a bit of the friendship that I gave them.
I don’t spend a penny,
just spend a little bit of humanity and time,
and get the same effect as giving a gift.
Because the money has been spent,
the gift recipient is very secure
when receiving the goods without hesitation,
the gift giver is not inherently profitable.
8. Borrowing the mouth of the person who speaks in our hearts
Borrowing someone’s mouth is an important technique.
A difficult thing to say again embellished
with “I hear people say” is no longer annoying.
Things that we do not want or are not convenient
to tell people directly can also be passed on
to a third person to mediate the conflict.
Now, here are a few methods of mouth-borrowing:
1 Find a matchmaker to communicate
In the past, in society,
there was a type of person called a matchmaker
who specialized in introducing two sides of a man
and a woman to bridge to marriage.
At that time, men and women were not married,
and before they got married,
there was no promise of love.
Any request or wish from
both sides is communicated through the matchmaker.
From there you can see how difficult this job is.
If the mouth is not flexible,
does not know how to look at the face but captures the image,
there is no seasoned communication spirit that makes
it difficult to fulfill the role of a matchmaker.
If when we want to ask someone for help,
but we can find a talented matchmaker
to let them show off their talent in conveying information
to convince the other party,
there is nothing better.
2. Borrowing a tiger’s disguise to scare people
There was a person who wanted to sell folding doors,
he knew that the director of this company knew the director,
so he went to the director’s house
with a bag of apples as a gift.
After chatting with him, he said:
“This time I came to your house
because of the introduction by the director,
the director also asked me to visit you.
To be honest,
I was very excited to meet you for the first time.
Listen to the department.
The boss said your company has not installed folding doors for protection.”
The next day the sale of folding doors was signed.
This man wisely avoided talking about himself,
but borrowed the words of the old man
to use the power of others to fight back,
making the opponent immediately accept it.
3. Ants for the opponent to actively speak out
Difficult to say is only relative,
the same sentence is difficult to say,
but if the other person says it first,
it is very natural.
In this case, leading the other party
to speak out first is the ultimate strategy.
Mr. Vuong was about to ask Mr. Trieu to do business.
Unfortunately, the day before yesterday, Mr. Trieu died.
Mr. Vuong had a dilemma,
if he opened his mouth to ask for money back,
it would make Mr. Trieu’s family angry,
if he didn’t ask for money,
it would be difficult for him
to lose money himself.
After helping to complete the funeral,
Mr. Vuong said to Mrs. Trieu:
“It’s unexpected that Mr. Trieu left so early,
we have just cooperated in business.
So it goes like this:
“Households with business relations.
If you sell to Mr. Trieu, you know,
you should bring that money
and continue to give them to trade.
See if it’s too difficult.
Do it early. It’s a good day.
“He didn’t show any intention to ask for money,
but he was chivalrous and mean.
In fact, he knew that Mrs. Tri was not capable of doing that,
what was the result? Mrs. Trieu comforted Mr. Vuong: “Last time.
Unfortunately, there’s a funeral in my family,
causing a great loss to your business,
and I can’t continue to work,
so please bring this money back
to find other business opportunities. “