John C. Maxwell! 15 Golden Rules of Personal Development!
Chapter 10 Elastic band principles
Growth stops when you lose the sense of distance
between where you are and where you might be
“Only a mediocre person is always at his best.” — W. Somerset Maugham
As a growing kid, I loved sports and was a pretty good athlete.
I got to know basketball when I was in fourth grade, and it became my passion.
I played basketball all through high school.
Like most students in college,
I was very active and of a rather slim build.
And in my 20s,
I continued to play basketball and golf with my friends.
But as I progressed further in my career
and entered my 30s and 40s,
I stopped exercising and taking care of my health
as much as I should.
I paid the price for that
when I had a stroke at the age of 51.
Since then,
exercise has become part of my daily routine.
For many years,
I walked or ran on a treadmill.
Sometimes jogging in part of the golf course
while playing with friends.
About five years ago,
I switched to swimming,
trying to exercise an hour a day in the pool.
I recently started doing Pilates exercises with Margaret.
The exercises focus mainly on training major muscles and flexibility.
To achieve such flexibility,
it is necessary to focus on stretching the muscles.
We find that very rewarding and beneficial.
I believe my body is at its best in 35 years.
Unwillingness to do what no one else wants to
is why people lack money. — Grant Cardone
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A CHAIN OF EFFORT
As I prepared to write this chapter,
I remembered all the times I’ve tried my best throughout my career.
One of my favorite quotes,
collected when I was a teenager:
“God’s gift to us is potential.
Our gift to God is to develop it.”
How do we do that?
By getting out of your comfort zone.
By continuously doing your best not only physically but mentally,
emotionally and spiritually.
Life begins where our comfort zone ends.
We get there by doing our best
“God’s gift to us is potential.
Our gift to God is to grow it.” – Anonymous
As I look back over the past 40 years,
I can see much of my career advancement has come
as a result of hard work experiences.
Check out some of those experiences below.
Never lower your price,
add value. — Grant Cardone
*****************
Choose my first pastor
I went to a church where no one knew my father, a parish priest.
My start will certainly be slower than
when I get to a place where my father can help.
Therefore, I have to work harder.
And I needed to find myself and my abilities.
I believe this has helped shape my career.
I was determined to work hard
and be creative in finding ways to lead people
and grow the church.
I learned a lot of leadership lessons at that first church.
And I learned to love people more.
Get serious about your money. — Grant Cardone
********************
Focus on teaching leadership skills
When I started talking about leadership in the mid-1970s,
it was a topic other pastors didn’t talk about.
There are those who criticize me
for focusing on what they consider a “secular” message,
although I must say that it is odd,
because the greatest leaders of all time can found in the Bible:
Abraham, Moses, David, Jesus, Paul, etc.
Even 40 years later,
some people continue to criticize me for it.
So why am I still teaching?
Because pastors have to lead people,
and in my day,
they don’t have leadership training,
even though they have to do it every day.
From very early on,
I worked hard as a leader.
I know others do too.
I want to help them.
By giving my best in this experience,
not only was I able to help many pastors,
but I was also able to discover the message
I believe I was born to teach others.
There are three steps to wealth:
First you have to make money,
then you have to keep it,
then you have to multiply it. — Grant Cardone
****************
Learn how to communicate internationally
I still remember the first time I spoke through an interpreter.
That happened in Japan.
The experience was uncomfortable
because I had to say a phrase or two,
pause for translation, and then say
hey, pause, and so on.
There are of course a lot of cultural differences
that need to be bridged.
I found it really difficult.
After I finished talking,
Margaret said that our daughter,
Elizabeth, then eight years old,
leaned on her and said,
“Father doesn’t sound good, does he, Mom?”
Even a child knew I didn’t connect well with my audience.
I love to communicate, and the easiest thing
for me was to simply give up the idea of talking
to other people outside of the US.
I have learned how to communicate effectively in English.
However, I see this as an opportunity to push and grow,
and maybe one day make a bigger impact.
It took me almost a decade to learn
how to connect with people in other cultures
while working with a interpreter,
but it’s totally worth it.
That foundation helped me found EQUIP,
which now trains leaders in 175 countries around the world.
Money is simple.
Buy cash flow producing assets. — Grant Cardone
**************
Exposure to new audiences
After teaching leadership skills to pastors for about 10 years,
I began to notice a trend.
More and more entrepreneurs are attending my leadership seminars.
I applaud this,
because I have been teaching the skill to
both teachers and staff in my church for many years.
But that hasn’t changed
what I’m doing.
Then one day,
when I was meeting with a publisher,
I knew that my books were being bought more
through secular retailers than religious ones.
In fact, over time,
the world has changed
and two-thirds of sales come through conventional retail channels.
I see this as an incredible opportunity
to reach more people.
But there is also a challenge.
Can I connect and communicate with business people?
People expect one thing
when they sit in church to hear a message from the pastor.
They expect something completely different
when paying to hear a speaker.
I’m not sure
if I can succeed.
It’s an experience that takes a lot of effort.
Money isn’t important until you need it,
then it’s too late. — Grant Cardone
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Focus on building a legacy
When I turned 60, I was ready to slow down.
I have moved to a sunny climate that I love.
I am financially blessed.
I have a grandchild,
it’s the greatest gift a person can have in this life.
I will continue to write and be a speaker,
but not at the previous speed.
It was a bountiful season after decades of work.
But then some opportunities presented themselves.
My books are now partnered with a new publisher.
I was asked to start a coaching company.
And I have the opportunity
to regain control of the training
and development material
I created over the last decade.
What should I do?
It means trying my best again,
but I’m ready to seize the opportunity
and accept the challenge.
And I’m so glad I did.
I entered another planting season
instead of just harvesting.
I believe it will allow me to help more people
than if I simply slowed down.
You don’t have to like someone,
but you have to treat them as you wish to be treated. ― Roy T. Bennett
**********************
Benefits of stress
Years ago, during a lecture at a leadership conference,
I placed a rubber band on the tables of the attendees.
I then started the lecture
by asking about all the uses people could think of.
At the end of the session,
I asked them if they could identify a common ground
for all the uses they suggested.
You’ve probably already guessed what that is.
Rubber bands are only useful
when they are stretched! So are we.
A smart person knows how to talk.
A wise person knows when to be silent. ― Roy T. Bennett
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1. Very few people want to give their best
There’s a joke about a longtime errand boy named Sam,
who was offered a full-time job by a factory owner,
who was having problems with the rats at the factory dam.
This boss asked Sam to eradicate the rat
and even provided him with a rifle to carry out the task.
Sam was overjoyed
because it was his first steady job
with a steady paycheck that he got.
After a few months,
one day a friend came to visit Sam.
He found Sam sitting on a lawn,
gun resting on his knee.
“Hey, Sam. What are you doing?”
You asked.
“Work, protect the dam.”
“From what?”
“The guinea pigs.
Sam’s friend looked over at the dam,
and at that moment a guinea pig appeared.
“There’s a baby!”
The friend exclaimed. “Shoot away!”
Sam didn’t budge.
Meanwhile, the guinea pig escaped.
“Why don’t you shoot it?”
“Are you crazy?” Sam replied.
“You think I want to lose my job?”
You may think the story is silly, but it is true.
I say that because
when I was in college,
I worked at a local meatpacking factory.
My job was to pull the meat racks
to the chillers and take orders from customers,
but I was curious about the whole operation
and wanted to find out how it worked.
After spending a few weeks there,
Pense, a longtime employee,
pulled me aside and said,
“You ask too many questions.
The less you know, the less you have to do.”
His job is to kill cows at the factory.
And that’s all he wanted to do.
He’s like the Wall Street Journal cartoon character
I’ve seen who told his HR manager,
“I know I’ve been overrated,
but I promise I’ll only use one half of my abilities.”
Most people only use a fraction of their potential
and rarely put in the extra effort
to reach their full potential.
Without the pressure
to grow in their lives,
there would be less desire to put in more effort.
Sadly, a third of high school graduates never read another book
for the rest of their lives,
and 42% of college graduates never read a book after graduation. industry.
Publisher David Godine claims
that only 32% of the US population has ever been to a bookstore.
I don’t know
if people are aware of the distance between where they are
and where they might be,
but relatively few people seem to want
to read books to try to bridge that gap.
42% of college graduates also never read a book after graduation.
Too many people are willing
to be content with an average life.
Is that bad? Read the following description written by Edmund Gaudet
then decide:
• “Average” is what unsuccessful people claim
when family and friends ask them
why they are not more successful.
• “Medium” is the top of the bottom, the best of the worst,
the bottom of the top, the worst of the best.
Which category are you?
• “Average” means mediocre,
unimportant,
ordinary,
unachievable, worthless.
• “Average” means the avoidance of the lazy;
lack of courage to have a place in life;
live by default.
• “Medium” means taking up space for no purpose;
take the trip of a lifetime,
without ever paying for a ticket;
does not pay interest on God’s investment in you.
• “Average” means going through a person’s life by time,
instead of going through one’s time by life;
is to kill time,
not use it to death.
• “Average” is to be forgotten
once you disappear from this life.
Successful people are remembered
for their contributions;
losers are remembered for their efforts;
but the “average”,
the silent crowd, is only forgotten.
• “Average” is committing the greatest crime against self,
humanity and God.
The saddest epitaph reads:
“Mr./Mrs. Average rests here
– here is all that remains,
except for their belief that they are ‘average’ people.³
I can’t stand the idea of settling down with the average,
how about you?
No one admires the average.
The best organizations don’t pay people to average.
Mediocrity is often not worth the effort.
As writer Bennett Arnold once said,
“True tragedy is the tragedy of a man
who has never tried his best in his life,
who has never reached his full potential,
who has never stood up,
straight to my full measure.”
We must be aware of the gap between us and our potential,
and let the pressure of that distance push us
to strive to be better people.
Money and power follow attention.
So whoever can get the most attention is the person who takes the most action
and sooner or later will get the most results. — Grant Cardone
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2. Staying with the status quo will only lead to dissatisfaction
I believe most people are naturally tempted
to settle into a comfort zone
where they choose safety over potential.
They fall into familiar patterns or habits,
do the same things in the same way
with the same number of people at the same time,
and get the same results.
It’s true that being in your comfort zone can feel great,
but it leads to mediocrity,
and then dissatisfaction.
As psychologist Abraham Maslow asserted,
“If you’re going to be anything below your means,
you probably won’t be happy
for the rest of your days.”
“If you’re going to be anything below your means,
you probably won’t be happy
for the rest of your days.”- Abraham Maslow
If you ever settle for the status quo and then wonder
why life doesn’t turn out the way you hoped,
you need to realize that you will only reach your potential
if you have the courage to push yourself away in safe zone
and escape from conventional thinking.
You must be willing to leave what feels familiar,
safe,
and secure.
You have to give up your excuses and move on.
You have to be willing
to face the pressure of pushing your potential.
It was the only way to avoid
what the poet John Greenleaf Whittier described when he wrote:
“Of all the sad words or phrases,
the saddest is: ‘It could have happened.’ ”
Does your money work as hard for you as you work for it? — Grant Cardone
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3. Efforts always start from within
When I was a teenager,
my father told me to read As a Man Thinketh by James Allen.
It has had a profound effect on my life.
It made me realize that reaching my potential starts from within.
Allen wrote:
“Your circumstances may not be appropriate,
but they will not remain so,
if you perceive the ideal and strive to achieve it.
You cannot move if the mind is still.”
“You cannot move if the mind is still.”– James Allen
Most people have a dream.
For some, it is always at the tip of the lips,
and for others,
it is buried deep in the heart,
but everyone has a dream.
However, not many people pursue them.
When I gave a lecture on the topic of achieving dreams,
and I asked the audience how many of them had a dream,
nearly everyone raised their hands.
When I asked,
“How many people are chasing that dream?”
Less than half of the arms went up.
And when the question is:
“How many people are achieving their dreams?”
I only see a few arms raised.
What is stopping them?
What is stopping you?
The authors of the book Now Discover Your Strengths,
Marcus Buckingham and Donald O. Clifton,
cited a Gallup poll that found most people dislike their work in current,
but they don’t change.
What is stopping them?
Most Americans want to lose weight,
but they don’t make the necessary efforts.
I always meet people
who tell me they want to write a book,
but when I ask,
“Have you started writing yet?”
The answer is almost always no.
Instead of dreaming,
wishing and waiting,
people need to find within themselves reasons to get started.
It must be remembered that our circumstances in life are largely
due to the choices we make and the actions we take or don’t take.
As we get older,
we become more and more responsible for our own circumstances.
If you’re simply average
or you’re not getting closer
to your dream this year than last year,
you can choose to accept it,
defend,
cover it up,
and justify it.
Or you can choose to change,
grow and create a new path.
Jim Rohn has observed:
“All living things appear
to be trying their best except man.
How big will the tree grow?
As high as possible.
Humans, on the other hand,
have the right to choose.
You can choose to be all or nothing.
Why not try your best to see how far you can do it?”
Where do you find the intrinsic motivation to put in the effort?
Compare what you are doing
with what you are capable of.
Measure yourself, Rate it.
If you don’t know what you can do,
talk to people who care and trust you.
If not, find some people.
Find a mentor who can help you see
who you could be, not who you are.
And use that image to inspire you to do your best
Money is used to make things happen. — Richard Branson
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4. Trying our best always requires us to change
At the beginning of this chapter,
I wrote about my own best-effort experiences at work.
When I think about these times in my life,
I have to admit that it was a challenge to change.
I do not like it.
I like to be comfortable
and am always tempted to resist pushing myself.
But growth doesn’t come
from staying in your comfort zone.
You can’t improve
and avoid change at the same time.
How can I embrace change and pull myself out of my comfort zone?
First of all, I stopped looking back.
It is very difficult to change if you keep focusing on the past.
That’s why I put a picture that says
“Yesterday ended the night before!”
On the desk.
It has helped me stay focused on the present
and work to improve what I can do today.
That is very important.
Author and contributor to the Seeds for the Soul series,
Alan Cohen says,
“To thrive, you must be willing
to make your present
and future radically different from your past.
The past is not your destiny.”
The second thing
I do is work on developing my “stretching muscles”.
A. G. Buckham,
a pioneer in the field of aeronautical photography,
observed when flights were just opened:
“Monotony is a terrible reward for the careful person.”
If you want to grow and change,
you have to take risks.
“Monotony is a terrible reward for the careful.”– A.G. Buckham
Innovation and progress are often initiated
by those who strive for change.
TV presenter Jeopardy! Alex Trebek commented:
“Have you ever met a successful person who stopped trying,
who was satisfied with what they achieved in life?
They want new challenges.
They want to get up and go…
and that’s one of the reasons they’re successful.”
Unfortunately,
for some people,
entrepreneurs are synonymous with gamblers.
But risk has certain advantages.
People who dare to take risks learn more
and faster than those who don’t take risks.
Their depth and range of experience is usually greater.
And they learn to solve problems.
All help them develop more.
Life’s greatest effort times come
when we do things we’ve never done before,
pushing ourselves harder
and in a not-so-pleasant way.
That requires courage.
But the good news is
that it makes us grow in ways we thought impossible.
And it brings to life what novelist George Elliot said:
“It’s never too late to achieve what you can.”
“It’s never too late to achieve what you can.”– George Elliot
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5. Attempts to pull you away from others
America seems to be becoming more and more satisfied with mediocrity.
But that is not the root of a country’s problem;
It’s a personal concession,
working below your full potential.
An individual need only say,
“I guess good enough is enough.”
But unfortunately,
mediocrity spreads
from person to person
and eventually metastasizes
to become a national danger.
Excellence seems to move further
and further away from common standards.
However, people
who live by the Rubber Band Principle and use the pressure
between where they are
and where they can be as a motivator
for effort can stand out
from the people around them.
Jack and Suzy Welch made this clear in Winning:
The Answers when a young person entering the corporate world asked,
“How quickly can I become a winner?”
They replied:
First, let’s forget about some of the most basic habits you learned in school.
Once you get into the real world
and whether you’re 22 or 62,
doing your first or fifth job,
the way to move forward is to go overboard.
Look at it this way, for years,
you’ve been taught virtues that meet specific expectations.
And you’ve been trained that an “A+” (excellent) grade is
for someone who can fully answer every question the teacher asks.
Those days are over.
To get an “A+” in business,
you have to expand the organization’s expectations
of you and then exceed it,
and you must answer every question the “teacher” asks fully,
plus a bunch of questions they didn’t even think about.
In other words,
your aim should be to make your boss smarter,
your team more efficient,
and the entire company more competitive thanks to your energy,
creativity,
and insight.
If your boss asks you to report on the prospects
for one of the company’s products next year,
you can be sure she already knows the answer.
So go beyond her expectations.
Do more research,
survey and analyze the data to give her something
that really expands her thinking.
In other words, give your boss something to surprise her,
something new and exciting that she can report to her superiors.
At the same time,
those ideas will help the company grow further and so will you.
Self-improvement is the best way
to help your team.
Successful people are different
because they initiate improvements that others need.
When you get better,
those around you benefit.
Excellence can be contagious in the same way as mediocrity.
The positive or negative points of a group
always start with a positive or negative point.
As you get better, so do others.
The only way not to think about money is to have a lot of money.― Edith Wharton
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6. Hard work can become a way of life
When we stop trying,
I believe we will stop living really.
We can keep breathing.
Our vital signs are still maintained.
But we died inside and our greatest abilities were lost.
As editor James Terry White admits:
“Nature painted His objection to ubiquitous inertia;
everything that doesn’t fight,
doesn’t work,
will quickly get worse.
What makes a person’s character
and maturity is the effort towards an ideal,
the effort to go further.”
I am getting old.
I won’t always be at peak performance.
But I kept reading, asking questions,
talking to interesting people,
working hard,
and embracing new experiences
until I lay down.
Too many people are just existing,
not living! Rabbi Nachman once said, ”
If tomorrow you don’t get better than today,
what do you need tomorrow for?”
I will not stop growing.
The following words encapsulate my feelings:
I’m not where I’m supposed to be,
I’m not what I want to be,
But I’m not what I used to be.
I haven’t learned how to arrive;
I’ve just learned how to keep going.
Translated:
I’m not where I’m supposed to be,
I’m not the person I want to be,
But I am not the me of the past.
I don’t know how to get there;
I just go and study.
“If you don’t get better tomorrow than you did today,
what do you need tomorrow for?”- Rabbi Nachman
I will continue to work hard until I do my best.
And whether I see success today or not.
Why? Because,
sadly, many people stop growing
after they have reached success.
Management expert Peter Drucker observes:
“The greatest enemy of tomorrow’s success is today’s success.
No one ever made a significant impact after they won the Nobel Prize.”
I don’t want success,
big or small,
to spoil me.
Money is always eager and ready to work for anyone
who is ready to employ it. ― Idowu Koyenik
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7. Hard work gives you meaning
The Indian statesman Mahatma Gandhi once said,
“The difference between what we do
and what we can do is enough
to solve most of the world’s problems.”
That difference is the gap between good and great.
And what helps to close that gap is our willingness
to give our best those on the “good” side of this gap live in permissive territory.
What they do is fine.
They follow the rules and live in peace.
But can they make a difference
if they follow the Rubber Band Principle?
Close the gap,
you will find yourself on the “great” side.
It is the land of potential.
That’s where people achieve extraordinary things.
They do more than they believe they are capable of,
and they make an impact.
How? By constantly focusing on making more of an effort.
They are constantly leaving their comfort zone
and moving towards their effective zone.
Philosopher Søren Kierkegaard said:
“One possibility is a suggestion from God. We must follow it.”
The path of possibility
is the opportunity God has given us to make a difference.
As we follow it,
we stop asking ourselves who we are,
and we begin to ask what kind of people we can become.
We may appreciate what we did yesterday,
but we don’t worship it.
It seems small compared to future possibilities.
Looking ahead fills us with energy.
We resonate with the words of Robert Louis Stevenson,
who said,
“Being who we are, and being who we can be,
is the only end in life.”
“One possibility is a suggestion from God.
We must follow it.”– Sren Kierkegaard
We are born with differences.
If we want to put in the effort,
that seed can grow
until it begins to multiply in our lives.
The great thing is that change
within us challenges us to change those around us,
and our growth creates a belief in others that they can grow.
When that happens in an environment
where people are working and growing,
indifference is replaced by difference.
And that’s how we started to change the world.
When you are young,
you may not need money,
but when you are old,
you cannot be without money. ― Tennessee Williams
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EFFORT TO THE END
One of my favorite sports heroes is Ted Williams,
widely regarded as the biggest hitman in Major League Baseball history.
The last person to cross the 400 mark in a single season,
he retired with a record of 521 home runs********s
and a career average of 344.
It is said that Williams could lift a baseball bat
and tell it was a 34-ounce bat about 964g)
and a lighter than half an ounce.
He once complained about the shafts of a bunch of clubs and sent them back.
As it turns out, their thickness falls short of 5/1,000 of an inch.
And when he sees a ball coming toward him
while he’s standing to catch the ball,
he can tell how it’s being thrown based on how the rims move.
This man loves to hit baseball
and is meticulous about every aspect of it.
And as long as he lived,
he continued to learn
and continue to strive in this field.
Recently, I read an anecdote about a meeting between Williams
and Red Auerbach’s Boston Celtics coach in the 1950s.
When these two greats discussed their sport,
Williams asked:
What do you guys eat on match day?”
“What do you want to know for?”
Auerbach asked again.
Looks like what you’re doing is fine.”
“I am always looking for new ways to improve what I do.”
Auerbach said of Williams:
“He thinks about the little things,
which are so important to being great.
When you’re great and you excel,
some athletes go after that.
This is the best baseball hitter
and he’s trying to get a little extra point.”
Like any athlete I’ve known,
Williams lives by the Rubber Band Principle.
He understands that growth stops
when you take the pressure off of where you are
and where you can be.
For most people,
as time goes on,
they lose the pressure that drives growth,
especially if they achieve some success.
But less pressure,
less efficiency.
And it undermines our growth rate towards our potential.
Remarkably, when it comes to hitting the ball,
Williams never loses that pressure.
Long after he retired, he still talked about hitting the ball
with anyone interested in it.
He is constantly learning,
and constantly sharing what he learns.
We should all strive to become people
with the same effort as him.
Wealth is power.
When you’re rich, anything is possible. — George Clason
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APPLICATION OF THE PRINCIPLE TO LIFE
1. In what areas of your life do you lose effort and choose to live peacefully?
Wherever they are,
you need to find an internal reason to get the urge to work again.
Let’s reconnect the breaks inside to keep moving forward.
Where are you lacking in potential?
Did you not achieve a goal
that you know you are capable of?
What habits have you developed
that hold you back from moving forward?
What past successes prevent you from continuing to win?
Remember, change is key to develop.
Use self-discontent to help you get started wherever you are stalling.
Life is a game. Money is how we score.— Ted Timer
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2. Make a plan to maintain the pressure of where you are
and where you can be by continually setting moderate goals for yourself.
If goals are too immediate,
you lose the pressure of achieving them too quickly.
If the goals are too high,
they can be too difficult to achieve
and cause you to become discouraged.
What is the right time frame
for you to maintain the pressure?
Three months? Six months?
A year?
Set goals for yourself according to your personality,
and then keep revisiting them at the end of those periods.
You want the goal to be just within reach,
not too easy,
but not too difficult either.
The ability to distinguish this is an art.
But it does give you well-deserved rewards.
Too many people spend money they earned..
to buy things they don’t want..
to impress people that they don’t like. ― Will Rogers
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3. If you need an overarching goal to keep pushing yourself,
think about what remarkable action you could take if only you were who you could be.
Dream big, and make it your life goal.
“Freedom is the only thing money gives you,
because you don’t have to worry about it anymore.”- Johnny Carson
