Creating a habit
I am always with you.
I can be a great help to you,
but I can also be a burden to you.
I can lead you to success,
but I can also make you a failure.
I always do what you want.
Tell me exactly how you’d like to respond to a certain issue,
and after a few tries,
I’ll automatically do the same.
With great people,
I create great things with them.
For those who are defeated,
I am ready to push them to the end,
which they themselves do not know.
So I – Habit, what is so important?
First, I’m just a thought or a random act of yours,
Then I become a habit of yours,
And in the end, I’m your controller!
Habits are things that you do over and over again
and sometimes you don’t even realize it.
There are good habits such as exercising in moderation,
planning before acting,
but there are also bad habits such as speaking ill of others,
negative thinking, low self-esteem…
Some other habits are innocuous,
such as taking a late-night bath,
eating late, reading the newspaper backwards
from the last page to the first page…
Depending on the habit,
it can make you human or destroy you.
Sow thought, reap action;
Sow action, reap a habit;
Sow a habit, reap a character;
Sow character, reap destiny. – Samuel Smiles
Fortunately, humans are stronger than habits
and so we can change habits.
Although there will be habits that are difficult to change,
it is not impossible.
At any time, you can completely change a bad habit for a better one,
if you want.
Practicing good habits will help you a lot.
7 habits of successful young people
Habit 1: Having a positive attitude
Habit 2: Know your future direction
Habit 3: Don’t leave today’s work for tomorrow
Habit 4: Think Win-Win
Habit 5: Listening to understand and to be understood
Habit 6: Have a spirit of cooperation
Habit 7: Know how to practice and develop skills
7 habits of successful young people
With these 7 habits, you will:
Take control of your life
Improve relationships with friends
Make smarter decisions
Get along with your parents
Determine your own worth
and decide what’s most important
Get more done in less time
Boost your confidence
A happy living
Find a balance between school,
friends and everything else
7 bad habits often seen in young people
Passive, have a negative attitude
You only jump when the water touch your feet
Only thinking about winning or losing
I like to talk first and then listen later
Do not cooperate with people
Concepts and Principles of Life
Perception is how you see a thing,
your point of view,
even your beliefs.
As you know,
our perception often creates limits.
It is the same as believing that you cannot go to college,
just as Ptolemy insisted that the earth was the center of the universe.
Conception is like a pair of eyeglasses.
Having incorrect views about yourself
or about life is like wearing the wrong pair of glasses.
Those glasses affect the way you see everything else
If you believe you are stupid,
that belief will make you stupid.
If you believe that your little sister is stupid,
you will find evidence to support that belief,
and she will remain dumb in your eyes.
If you believe you can,
you will find an invisible power.
If negative self-concepts limit your ability,
positive self-concept will bring you good results.
“How do I correct it if my perception is distorted?”.
The best way to adjust is to confide in someone
who believes in you and wants to do good for you.
My mother is such a person to me.
Mom always trusted and encouraged me:
“Sean, you can be class president!”,
or “Why don’t you invite her out,
I think she really wants to hang out with you.”
Whenever I want to assert myself,
I talk to my mother,
and she will clean my darkened glasses for me.
Every successful person usually has a mentor by their side.
That person can be a teacher, a parent, a sibling,
a grandparent or a friend…
As long as there is one person,
it doesn’t matter who he is.
The important thing is that you can find direction,
and optimism from them.
Not only must we have the right perception of ourselves,
we must also know the right perception of others
to avoid unfortunate mistakes.
Looking at things from a different perspective helps us to understand
why other people act the way they do.
We often judge others
when we don’t have enough information to properly understand them.
A young man named Monica said:
When I lived in California,
I had many good friends
and I never paid attention to the new neighbors who moved in.
Then when I moved to another place,
I became a “new ghost”.
At that time I wished someone cared about me.
Now I understand what it’s like to have no one to be friends with.
From then on, do you think Monica would treat new people differently?
Our perceptions are often incomplete, inaccurate,
or very messy.
So don’t be hasty in judging, hating,
or having harsh opinions about others or about yourself.
Because our vision is limited,
we rarely see the full picture of reality,
or do not have enough data for judgment.
Seeing things from a different point of view can make a big difference
in our attitude towards people.
Therefore, we should be open to new information,
open to other perspectives on life,
and be willing
to change our perception
when we know that we are wrong.
“Oh, I have changed the confidence!”
More importantly, if you want
to make a big change in your life later on,
you must first change your current misconceptions.
Just like when you change your life glasses,
everything will change when you see through a new pair of glasses.
After all, all the difficulties in life
(relationships, self-perception, moods, emotions…)
are also the result of misperceptions.
For example, if you have a bad relationship with your father,
it may be because you both have had misconceptions about each other.
You’re probably thinking that he’s an old-fashioned,
out-of-date old man,
isolated from the modern world.
And he thinks you are an insolent,
unfilial, ungrateful child.
In fact, the concept of both is not correct
and that hinders the two sides to understand each other.
Have you ever wondered:
“What do I usually waste time thinking about?”,
“Who or what often invades my thoughts?”.
That is your perception in life.
The most important thing to you is your outlook on life,
your life glasses,
or as I like to call it:
the center of your life.
So where does adolescence place the focus of life?
Usually on friends, parents, outside material things,
sports, personal interests, idols, self, work…
each has its own advantages
but all are incomplete under different aspects.
And so when there is a change,
your life is often messed up.
Focus on friends
There is nothing better than having a good group of friends,
and nothing worse than being shunned by friends.
Friends are important but
We shouldn’t focus on that.
Why? Because they are fickle.
Sometimes they talk bad about you behind your back
or when they have a new friendship,
they forget about you.
Believe it or not, one day,
friends are no longer the biggest thing in your life.
Make as many friends as you can,
but don’t make them the basis of your life.
It’s an unstable foundation.
Focus on matter
Sometimes we think that the most beautiful car,
a branded suit,
the most modern music player,
the most trendy hairstyle…
will bring joy and happiness.
Material things sometimes hide in the form
of fame such as class president,
starring in a play…
There is nothing wrong with achieving and enjoying it,
but we should never focus on material things.
In the long run,
material value will inevitably be lost.
I once read a very good sentence:
“If what I have today helps define who I am,
then when those things are gone, who am I?”.
Focus on learning education is essential
to our future and should be a top priority.
But we should be careful not
to let these titles dominate our entire lives.
There are teenagers
who are so obsessed with getting high grades
that they forget that the real purpose of learning is understanding.
There have been many excellent learners
who have maintained a balance in their studies. life.
Remember that our value is not the sum of our GPA!
Focus on parents can be a good source of love and direction for you.
You should respect and trust your parents,
but focusing on them and living just
to please them rather than living for yourself
is not necessarily good.
Focus on other things
The list of focuses could go on forever:
playing a sport,
choosing an idol,
focusing on yourself,
or focusing on work…
But all the important things.
The above concept does not provide the sustainable stability we need.
It’s not that you shouldn’t try
to be really good at something like dancing or oratory,
these things should be done!
But there should be a fine line between being infatuated
and putting your life in it.
That is the line that we should not cross.
So is there a center of gravity that really supports it?
That is the right principle of life.
What is the principle?
Drop a ball from above,
it will fall down by itself.
It is a principle of nature aka a principle.
There are many principles that govern the natural world
and the human world.
These principles do not depend on anyone
and are always fair to everyone.
Truthfulness is a principle;
love ethics is a principle;
helping others is a principle;
sense of responsibility, moderation, loyalty…
are moral principles in life.
Just as a compass always points in the right direction North;
Your heart will realize what is the right principle of life.
Focus on the right principle of living.
How you look, how you think,
you will achieve exactly the same.
It is necessary to absolutely maintain faith
to live the life principles you have chosen,
especially when you are witnessing a lot of people
who advance in life with lies,
deception, chance, selfishness.
What you don’t see,
however is that broken moral principles always end up harming them.
Right principles of life never fail you.
The principle of life doesn’t talk bad about you behind your back,
it doesn’t grow up and leave you,
it doesn’t feel the pain of being unemployed.
It also does not depend on skin color, gender,
health or external appearance.
Having the right principles of living at the heart
of your life is the most stable,
stable and sure foundation you can rely on,
and we all need it.
If you live with the principle of being willing to help,
respecting others, being affectionate,
you will easily have many friends
and you will become a good friend.
Setting the right principles of life
is also a way to become a person of good character.
Decide now which principles are worthy of your life’s focus.
In any situation you should ask yourself:
What principle should I apply now?
Then stick to that principle and don’t look back.
If you feel tired or have a setback,
try applying the principle of life balance.
If you feel like no one believes you,
then the principle of honesty is what you need most right now.
Let’s apply these habits step by step into your life:
Think about the guilt that hinders yourself,
do what to refute that opinion
Think about the strange,
confusing behavior of an acquaintance
and find out what makes them so.
treat people the way you want them to treat you.
Don’t get angry,
or criticize anyone,
unless you want to be treated that way.
When doing something,
think about the principle of hard work,
try a little more,
a little more and you will see the end result surpassing expectations.
Create a Personal Account
Start with yourself
Before you can overcome the difficulties in life,
you must conquer yourself.
Every change starts with you.
Never forget this, friends!
Be confident to win yourself first.
We learn to crawl before we can walk,
learn arithmetic before algebra.
We must change ourselves before we want to change others.
If you want to change your life,
the starting point is yourself,
not your parents or friends or teachers.
All change starts with you:
from the inside out, not from the outside in.
A priest once said:
When I was young,
with unlimited freedom and imagination,
I often dreamed that one day I could change the world.
As I become more mature and knowledgeable,
I know that this world cannot be changed.
And I decided to shorten my dream:
to change my hometown.
But that’s also unbelievable.
Entering middle age,
in my last efforts,
I wanted to change my family,
the people I loved the most,
but still there was no change.
Now, on the verge of death,
I realized for the first time that:
if I change myself,
then I will affect my family;
With the help of my family,
my hometown will become better
and maybe I can change the world.
What you can do for yourself is like creating a personal account.
Just like depositing
and withdrawing money at a bank,
you can deposit and withdraw from your personal account what you think,
what you say, what you do.
For example, when I get over myself,
I feel in control:
so I have a deposit in my personal account.
If I break a promise to myself and feel disappointed:
my account has been withdrawn.
If your savings don’t have much left, don’t despair.
From today, save little by little, gradually you will become “rich”.
Signs of a “rich” account:
You hold yourself accountable and resist presure.
You don’t care too much about being known.
You see life through an optimistic lens.
You live with a purpose.
You are happy with the success of others.
Signs of a “poor” account:
You are easily influenced by your friends.
You often struggle with feelings of frustration and self-doubt.
You care too much about what other people think of you.
You act arrogant to hide your insecurities.
You destroy yourself with drugs,
pornography, vandalism or joining bad gangs.
You get jealous easily,
especially when someone close to you has success.
I tell you a few ways to save,
of course with each way of depositing
there is also a corresponding withdrawal method:
Keep Your Promises To Yourself
Have you ever been repeatedly broken promises by someone?
Of course, for you,
that person will have no credibility at all, right?
This will happen to you if you break a promise to yourself.
We should treat the promises we make
to ourselves as seriously as we make the important people in our lives.
That is you are keeping the promise to yourself.
If you’ve lost control in your life,
start with the simplest thing you can affect – yourself.
Make a promise to yourself and commit to it.
Start with a small “savings” deposit like promising to get up early,
then gradually increase it like getting up earlier and exercising every day.
Do Good Works
I suddenly remembered the words of a psychologist:
If you are feeling depressed,
it is best to find a way to help someone.
Because when you help them,
you will turn your soul outside and receive joy.
When you feel happy,
you will forget your sad story.
Giving isn’t just about helping others,
but it also makes your life better.
In Palestine there are two seas.
A freshwater sea with many schools of fish.
The shoreline is a bright green.
Birds gather from everywhere.
People come here
and build their nests in coastal houses.
It is the Sea of Galilee.
Then the Jordan River flows south into another sea.
Here there are no schools of fish,
no fluttering leaves,
no chirping birds,
no children’s laughter.
The difference is because the Sea of Galilee accepts it
but does not keep it for itself.
For every drop of water that comes in,
the Sea of Galilee gives away another drop.
Equal giving and receiving.
The other sea is more selfish.
It does not share any drops of water with anyone.
It is called the Dead Sea.
There are two kinds of people in the world,
just as there are two kinds of seas in Palestine.
Be Good To Yourself
We cannot think that
You will be perfect the next morning,
and if you are not yet then be patient
and give yourself time to make it happen.
Learn to laugh at the stupid things you’ve done.
In addition, you also have to know how
to forgive yourself when you make mistakes.
Ocean-going ships often have moats clinging to their bottoms,
which can rot the ship.
The easiest way is to dock in a freshwater port,
the moat will fall out of the bottom of the ship.
And you, do you have “moats” of mistakes,
regrets and pain in the past?
Give yourself a chance to shake off those moats.
And that’s a way to deposit money into your personal account.
Honesty comes in many forms:
The first is being honest with yourself.
I find that whenever
I fake or try to be someone I get frustrated.
So I got a withdrawal from my personal account!
Next is honesty in our actions.
Are you honest with the people around you?
When around you,
you still see a lot of people living a lie;
If you still see people lying to parents,
teachers, cheating in exams, etc.,
it is really brave and very courageous to keep yourself honest.
Always remember that:
Every act of honesty will be a deposit
to your personal account and that honesty is your property.
You should take time for yourself to refresh yourself and relax a bit.
Otherwise, you will lose the joy that is coming to you
Any one of us needs a place to express our emotions,
to refresh our spirits.
It doesn’t have to be a romantic flower garden,
on the top of a mountain or it has to be a quiet beach,
only the sound of waves crashing,
it can be a bedroom,
bathroom or somewhere,
a quiet place.
In addition to finding a quiet place,
there are many other ways to refresh yourself
such as exercising, dancing, knitting…
Some people also like to watch classic movies,
play music, draw,
or talk with a close friend.
Journaling is also a great way!
Awakening My Talents
Developing your talents, strengths,
or finding joy in what you do is also a great way
to add an extra point to your personal account.
Don’t think that talent is limited to sports,
dancing, or winning a scholarship…
In fact, talent manifests itself in many other ways:
you can read, write, or speak a foreign language;
You can make a gift for your loved ones by hand,
you are very smart,
easy to get along with,
have the ability to organize…
It’s a form of self-expression and confidence-building.
Please join me step by step to build trust for yourself.
Keep your promise to yourself
Wake up early as planned for 3 consecutive days.
Identify a task that is fairly easy to do today
(like doing laundry, finishing a book).
Do good deeds
Do good deeds such as taking out the trash for the family,
cleaning the room for the loved one.
Find something to do to make a difference:
volunteering for social work,
or reading to the blind.
Awaken your talent
List the talents you want to develop,
and write down each step.
List the talents you admire in others
Treat yourself well
Think of something that makes you feel inferior to your friends,
then take a deep breath and say to yourself,
“It’s not that bad!”.
Whenever I find myself having wavering thoughts,
replace it with three positive thoughts about myself.
Find a fun,
and do it during the day:
like turn on the music and dance…
If you feel bored,
get up and go for a walk in the park.
If your mom asks you what you’re working on:
Tell the truth,
don’t be crooked.
For a day,
try not to exaggerate or embellish yourself,
but to look honestly at what you did and didn’t do.
One of my favorite quotes is:
“No one at the moment of his death wishes he had spent more time at work.”
I often ask myself,
“What do they want to spend more time on?”,
and I have found the answer:
“Spend more time with the people they love.”
Good relationships are the material that creates the poetry of life.
As with your personal account,
your relationship account will show how trustworthy
and honest you are in your relationships
with the world around you.
A relationship account is like a savings account at a bank.
You can deposit more or withdraw.
A strong and healthy relationship is the result
of persistent deposits over a long period of time.
Unlike at a bank, only one
or two accounts can be opened.
You can open relationship accounts with everyone you meet.
If you smile and say hello to your new neighbor,
you have opened an account with him.
If you ignore it,
you also open an account
but it is a negative account.
Unlike a deposit account,
once you have opened a relationship account with someone,
you cannot close it.
That’s why you can be thrilled
to see someone you haven’t seen in a long time.
That is also why a person can hold a grudge in his heart for many years.
In a deposit account, $10 is $10.
In a relational account,
deposits tend to evaporate and withdrawals tend to fossilize.
That means you need to keep sending small amounts
into your important relationships to keep them positive.
So how can we build a strong relationship account
or revive a weak relationship account?
But we can’t do it all at once,
just like we can’t eat an elephant all at once.
If I have a negative relationship account of 5,000 points with you
then I need to deposit 5,001 points in total
to keep the relationship account positive.
Usually, there are 5 basic ways to maintain or lose a relationship account, which are:
What is the biggest reward that other people give you?
When a friend, relative.. says “you are so kind”,
that statement makes me happy forever
When I make a mistake,
I am not only forgiven,
but also understood and helped.
A friend told me that he loves and trusts me
because I live honestly.
I feel like I mean something to him.
Keeping promises is essential to building trust.
You have to do what you say.
If you find yourself unable to keep your word for special reasons,
explain to others why you can’t keep your promise.
If your relationship account with your parents is low,
add to it by keeping your word.
When your parents trust you,
everything will be better and smoother.
Have you ever been through a lot of bad luck and felt extremely sad,
then suddenly someone said a nice word to you,
and the day brightened up again?
Sometimes small things like sending someone a greeting,
a smile, a compliment,
a hug… make a huge difference.
If you want to build a relationship with others,
try to do the little things,
because in a relationship,
a small gesture of care can mean a lot.
Mark Twain said,
“I can live three months on a sincere compliment.”
“One kind word can warm three months of winter.”
– Japanese proverb
If you have something cute to say to someone,
don’t hesitate, even for a moment.
As Ken Blanchard writes in “The One-Minute Manager”:
“Good ideas that are not expressed are not worth a penny.”
Please don’t wait until someone else has died to give flowers.
One of the biggest relationship account deposits
you can make is to be loyal to others.
That loyalty is shown not only in their presence but also in their absence.
When you speak ill of others behind their backs,
you are harming yourself on two fronts:
– First, you have made a withdrawal
with everyone who is listening to you.
Second, you’ve made what I call “invisible withdrawals”
from the person you’re talking about.
What makes a loyal person?
Loyal people always keep secrets
When people share something with you
and ask to keep it a secret, don’t tell a third party.
What makes a loyal person?
Loyal people do not gossip
This doesn’t mean you don’t
talk about others,
but only in terms of constructive feedback.
Remember, “A clear mind is always thinking about ideas,
but a dark mind is only talking about other people.”
What makes a loyal person?
Loyal people always protect others
If a group begins to speak ill of another person,
refuse to participate in the gossip
or boldly stand up for that person.
Listening to others is one of the best ways
to make a deposit in your relationship account.
People need to be heard as much as they need food.
If you take the time to listen,
you will surely have strong friendships.
Know how to say I’m sorry
Knowing how to say sorry every time you behave excessively
or make a mistake is that you can save a withdrawal
from your relationship account.
Apologizing will help you feel relieved,
while also reducing the anger of others.
Usually the inclination of the person who is guilty of a crime is
to find a sword for self-defense
and also to protect himself later.
But when you apologize,
you have melted away the hatred in their hearts
and dropped that sword.
Clean Activities, Get The Handy Of Looking
Many times in order to please others,
in order to achieve the immediate results,
we often tend to be rude and unclear.
In order for others to trust you,
you should avoid giving vague messages,
making vague promises.
To fill your relationship account,
you should be clear,
don’t let others misunderstand
or hope for unreal things.
Because letting one person down means you have already withdrawn
a large amount in the relationship account!
Find someone whose relationship with you has been damaged,
maybe it’s a friend.
Challenge yourself to rebuild your relationship with them.
Remember that it takes a long time
to rebuild what has fallen.
Slowly they will understand
and you will really make up with each other.
Follow the steps below to build a relationship account for yourself, friends!
If you go out at night,
promise your parents when you’ll be back and keep it.
Today, before making any statement,
think and ask yourself if you can make it right.
Don’t say “I’ll call you”
or “Take me out to dinner” if you really can’t.
Follow the steps below to build a relationship account for yourself, friends!
Save delicious food for someone absent from the house.
Say thank you to the people you’ve wanted to thank for a long time.
Follow the steps below to build a relationship account for yourself, friends!
Think about when and where it’s hard
to avoid conversations about other people.
With a close friend, in a locked room or while eating?
Make a plan to gradually move away from it and give it up.
Follow the steps below
to build a relationship account for yourself, friends!
Listen To Listening
Today, try not to talk much about others,
but spend more time listening.
Remember who you rarely listen to now?
Grandma, dad, mom or brother?
Try listening to them once!